Impotently fulminating about absolutely everything since 2006.
Postings whenever I happen to get around to them. Ditto comment moderation.
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All right, Mr. Trump. In attacking the NFL and NBA players who one way or another refused to stand and put their hands on their hearts when The Star Spangled Banner was played, you’ve opened and then dumped the contents of a giant can of worms onto your own plate. Now it’s time for you to eat them.
Just to begin, athletes, like everyone else, are guaranteed freedom of expression by the U.S. Constitution, which is one of the things for which the American flag is a symbol. Thus, when you choose to deny them this freedom, Mr. Trump, it is you who is disrespecting the flag.
You have ignored the simple truth that the protest of these athletes is legitimate — that as people of color, they are regularly the victim of police brutality, documented so many times in recent years that you have to be willfully blind to claim it does not exist.
Since you’ve brought up the national anthem, let’s also deal with the question of why it deserves no respect and ought to be dumped in favor of some other song. The answer boils down to this: our great nation has one of the lousiest national anthems in the world. Consider:
The Star Spangled Banner is virtually un-singable. The clip of Roseanne Barr slaughtering it at the top of this post may have been Barr’s idea of a sendup, but it wasn’t very far from the truth. You can carry a tune and still, like million of Americans, you may not be able to credibly sing this unmusical, unlyrical song. It staggers over wide-ranging octaves like a careening drunk bouncing off walls. What’s more, the anthem’s lyrics are so ineptly out of meter with the music that singers need to insert syllables where none exist in the English language, disrespecting not only the dignity of our nation, but our language as well. Example: (“And the star spangled ban-ner in tri-yi-yi-umph sha-all way-ave….”)
Speaking of drunks, the music was actually composed for a bunch of drunks with sex on their minds. It was a song written and boozily sung originally in England, not America, in the Eighteenth Century, by members of a drinking club, the Anacreontic Society.
But worse yet, the little-known and even less-sung final stanza of the Star Spangled Banner all but curses enslaved black men.
Their blood has wash’d out their foul footstep’s pollution.
No refuge could save the hireling and slave
From the terror of flight or the gloom of the grave,
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave
O’er the land of the free and the home of the brave.
The "foul footsteps" to which Francis Scott Key refers are those of slaves in Maryland who fought on the side of the English when promised their freedom. So clearly Key, himself a slaveholder, didn’t not consider black people suitable citizens for either the land of the free or the home brave.
No indeed. Instead he believed blacks were “a distinct and inferior race of people which all experience proves to be the greatest evil that affects a community.” Little wonder he cursed them with the “gloom of the grave.” For that reason alone the song deserves to be stricken from opening ceremonies. It is not a patriotic song. It is anti-patriotic.
So what should we sing instead? Well before World War I, in Newark, New Jersey, a woman named Katherine Lee Bates and an Episcopal choirmaster named Samuel A. Ward wrote a beautiful, melodic, easy-to-sing and patriotic hymn. It was about our nation and its natural beauty, and brotherhood — and not about a battle and a curse on some of our people. Moreover, unlike the Star Spangled Banner, it mentions — repeatedly — the name of our nation.
It concedes the nation has flaws. It calls upon God to men them. It mentions liberty, law, gleaming cities of alabaster, and brotherhood. Yes, "America The Beautiful." Here’s a touching rendition of it by Ray Charles
And for a backup? In 1893 a poor immigrant boy with no skills and as yet little education was permitted to enter the United States. In time he discovered he had a talent for writing songs. Over the years he created great fortunes and employment for others with this talent, writing over 20 Broadway hit shows.
Among his many songs were “Puttin’ On the Ritz,” “Alexander’s Ragtime Band,” and the holiday songs “In Your Easter Bonnet,” and “White Christmas.” His name? Irving Berlin.
Perhaps Berlin’s his greatest and — dare I say it? — most sacred song was a hymn he wrote to the country that let him in, instead of attempting to wall him out.
Think what a glorious song a new national anthem could be, if America focused on its mission and message to humanity, and not always, constantly, incessantly, annoyingly on you, Mr. Trump, playing while you're all alone at night with your petty little tweeter.
Here is Irving Berlin, late in life and a bit frail with age, singing his song — followed by a chorus that demonstrates the way God Bless America could sound in stadiums and theaters across America if it became the new national anthem.
1. I’m grateful that starting Inauguration Day the turkeys will be where they belong. That’s on the farm, or on the dinner table, but at long last not in the White House. No, I don’t think Obama’s perfect. But at least he’s evidently smart, studious and careful — and apparently awake, alert and intellectually curious. Look at America's economy, military situation, diplomatic situation and reputation in the world. Then imagine how it would be if we had four more years of Bush, or McCain, or Sarah Palin.
2. I’m grateful that moose chili tastes probably as bad as five-day-old turkey chili. I never tasted moose chili. So how do I know it's awful? Did you ever have an urge to take a really fine sirloin or T-bone steak and make chili out of it? I didn’t think so. The fact that Sarah Palin can’t think of anything better to make out of a dead moose than chili — even when the TV news cameras are there to watch her do it — probably means that if you’re in your right mind you probably don’t want to eat moose. And that bodes well for the moose population of Alaska. Except, of course, for the occasional moose who crosses Palin's path.
3. I’m grateful that cloying and thinly-disguised Palin for President in 2012 ads are already running on TV. I mean, we all know this doofus thinks she knows enough about diplomacy, economics and law to be President tomorrow morning. By repeatedly shoving herself and her fawning supporters down our throats, she’s inadvertently assuring us she’ll be old news (and very boring or laughable old news) in 2012.
4. I’m grateful that the Big Three automakers are run by morons. By showing up in Washington via their private corporate jets to beg for money, and then by offering Congress no plan beyond “gimme lotsa dough,” the Dingbat Three have given the next President grounds to seize temporary control of the companies via their stock when he bails them out. Then he can force them to produce the kind of low-or-no-carbon, fuel-efficient cars America (and the world) really needs. If that happens, who knows? There might even be a world market for Made In America automobiles again. Will Obama do it? I dunno. But Americans can hope, can’t we?
5. Ditto the banks. I hope, I pray, that the Obama administration will forcefully remind America’s bankers what bankers are supposed to do. It's what they used to do before the free market imbeciles took over and broke America’s economy worse than Al Qaeda ever dreamed possible.
6. I’m grateful that our next president is not about to shove religion down our throats. Freedom of religion also means freedom from religion — the right to decide how, when and even whether you pray, and what you believe about whomever or whatever you are praying to. Contrary to what the religious right would have you believe, this nation was not founded as a Christian nation. Nothing against Christianity, you understand, but consider:
• Tom Paine, who wrote the pamphlets “Common Sense” and “The Age of Reason” that helped precipitate the revolution was not a Christian, but a Deist. Ditto Thomas Jefferson, and probably Ben Franklin. Ditto George Washington (who was also a Mason and who refused communion), John Adams, and probably James Madison.
7. I am equally grateful that our soon-to-be President realizes that patriotism can be summed up not by what we wear on our lapels, but what we do for our nation. Just for openers, if you are unwilling to pay your fair share of taxes, you are not a patriot. You are a pretender.
Happy Thanksgiving. And may you enjoy many more in a nation that was founded on freedom and truth, not on hypocrisy, bullying, flag pins or any particular religion.