Monday, August 13, 2012

Beaver bites scoutmaster, turtle attacks human bride, kangaroo busts out of zoo, Romney picks Paul Ryan.

There must be a full moon out somewhere.

In Pennsylvania, a Boy Scout leader set out to swim across the Delaware River and got bitten by a beaver that turned out to be rabid.

In London, a pair of aquarium keepers wearing full wedding regalia and scuba gear decided to get married underwater in a giant fish tank.”Not in my backyard!” was the reaction of a sea turtle, which attacked the bride and her wedding dress.

In Berlin, a kangaroo, evidently assisted by a fox and a wild boar, who dug holes under the fence confining them, busted out. Last heard, the two carnivores were hunting for Bratwusrst while the ‘roo was devouring lawns.

If you missed all this, it may be because, since the weekend, the news media have focused laser-like on the other piece of weird news – Willard Romney’s choice of Paul Ryan as a running mate.

Until now, Willard hasn’t seemed to have much of an economic plan, save to “undo Obamacare” — a move that would drive up health care costs while leaving many citizens essentially bereft of the financial means for hospitalization or surgery. They'd simply have to get out of the way and die.

Now Ryan has a “solution” for Medicare, too, not to mention a "fix" for a Social Security system that doesn't need fixing. It involves gutting Medicare and crippling Social Security, while cutting what’s left of the taxes that the rich pay. The loss to the government from cutting the taxes of billionaires would be made up for by slashing the Social Security income and medical care of the old and poor.

This is not likely (I hope) to endear Romney and Ryan to senior citizens and middle-aged folks. Maybe not even to their children, who will have to start paying for their parents’ care, once Social Security and Medicare become nothing more than bad jokes.

Did I mention I think there must be a full moon out?

Well than, how about the latest conspiracy theory that a weather balloon in Antarctica is really a flying saucer?

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