tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-293617412024-03-14T02:39:02.383-04:00The New York CrankImpotently fulminating about absolutely everything since 2006.
Postings whenever I happen to get around to them. Ditto comment moderation.
You got a problem with that?The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.comBlogger1068125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-39642671371477864912021-03-17T11:54:00.003-04:002021-03-17T17:07:23.536-04:00Curses! The mother of all maledictions surfaces in the San Francisco Bay Area. Plus, Le Scandale des Flip-Flops flummoxes French flics.<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PmM5MNHKXaM/YFIiq0Nk4II/AAAAAAAAEJ0/IdRdcIFMLtcEgsb7Hq9MkgHYa71EN1tNACNcBGAsYHQ/s666/Person-walking-in-flipflops.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="444" data-original-width="666" height="266" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PmM5MNHKXaM/YFIiq0Nk4II/AAAAAAAAEJ0/IdRdcIFMLtcEgsb7Hq9MkgHYa71EN1tNACNcBGAsYHQ/w400-h266/Person-walking-in-flipflops.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /> <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">Please correctly pronounce what this Frenchman has on his feet. They are “fleep-flopes!” Long O on “flops”, s’il vous plait.</span><div><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Let me right off the bat acknowledge that the situation in Oakland, CA, was anything but funny. A dance party had been held in what was evidently a firetrap of a warehouses. Thirty-six people lost their lives in an ensuing fire. Derek Almena, the impresario — if you can call him that — who’d arranged the party was brought up on trial. There was a plea deal. It appears he will be able to remain out of jail.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">But that didn’t for an instant quell the rage of one grief-stricken parent who unloaded on Almena in court in a tirade that ought to go down as a classic in the history of furious courtroom maledictions. She barraged him with such world-class rage, hate, and a thirst for revenge that it ought to serve as a future model to anyone who chooses to level a curse on a malefactor. Reports the<a href="https://www.mercurynews.com/2021/03/08/ghost-ship-master-tenant-expected-to-be-sentenced-victims-families-ask-for-different-deal/?utm_email=44B5E524A49FA4C15489947E89&g2i_eui=LslpFm1ql5RZtc0vdeKoh6bXnQcgQTu9&g2i_source=newsletter&utm_source=listrak&utm_medium=email&utm_term=https%3a%2f%2fwww.mercurynews.com%2f2021%2f03%2f08%2fghost-ship-master-tenant-expected-to-be-sentenced-victims-families-ask-for-different-deal%2f&utm_campaign=bang-mult-nl-pm-report-nl&utm_content=curated"> San José Mercury-News</a>:</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; letter-spacing: -0.1pt;"></span></span></p><blockquote><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; letter-spacing: -0.1pt;">At one point during Monday’s sentencing hearing, the mother of Chelsea Faith Dolan, who died in the Dec. 2, 2016, fire, cursed Almena.</span><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="letter-spacing: -0.1pt;">“May you Derick Almena take on the visions that I see each day and feel the pain of my nightmares,” Colleen Dolan said after initially struggling to speak. “My hope is that in giving these visions to you I may be free. I curse you with the intense burning heat and flames that scorch all the hair from your body and that peel the skin away from your face. I curse you with the choking smoke saturating your lungs until they bubble and blister and foam oozes from your mouth and nose. I curse you with the pain in the bones and muscles that comes from clenching in fear as you face the fury of a firestorm coming to consume you.”</span></span><span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span></p></blockquote><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Those seeking to curse their enemies would do well to study Ms. Dolan’s speech as an example of how detailed, graphic, and vengeful a proper curse can be. After that, any curse that consists of dropping a mere F-bomb will fade into insignificance.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">Flip-flops? Mais, non!<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">This is a police matter!<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">We all know that the French care very much about how you pronounce their language. Now it turns out that they care equally about what’s on your feet when you exercise.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">See, the French last year had been pretty much in lockdown due to the COVID-19 pandemic. But exceptions could be made. One of them was, you could leave the house to get in a bit of exercise, or “physical activity.” There were caveats of course. You had to be within a kilometer of your home. And you could only venture out for an hour. But hey, it’s a chance to raise your heartbeat a bit, send a bit of blood coursing through your veins, and feel a bit of sun on your face for a change. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">So why not try to cure that cabin fever?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Here’s why:<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">If your feet are not properly attired in athletic shoes you could be in big trouble with the cops, or <i>les flics</i>, as they’re sometimes called in France. (And it's pronounced, "lays fleeks.")<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Enter a young guy named Laurick, who last year left his home for what he believed a was a perfectly legal reason — “physical activity.” Within a matter of minutes, <i>les flics</i> busted him and socked him with a fine of 135 Euros — very roughly $150. Since then, they’ve tacked on an addition thirty-one Euros in procedural costs. <a href="https://www.connexionfrance.com/French-news/Covid-Frenchman-fined-over-lockdown-exercise-in-flip-flops?utm_source=Master+List&utm_campaign=1c4c8d8354-Newsletter_Feb_12_2021_COPY_01&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_9b5fbe85b4-1c4c8d8354-358521929">And his case may now go before a judge</a>.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">The problem? He was wearing flip-flops instead of proper sneakers. <i>Quel horreur!</i><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">“The situation is so grotesque it’s funny,” fumed Laurick’s father, Alain. He is now in the process of trying to prove that “physical activity” can be defined more broadly that the police interpretation of the law, which limits activity to “doing sports.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Or perhaps walking around in flip flops <i>is</i> a sport. Stay tuned.</span><o:p></o:p></p></div>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-67195031769680586032021-03-10T12:13:00.000-05:002021-03-10T12:13:53.980-05:00Where do women belong? Burger King and the British rag The Mail, learn some painful lessons. Is Tucker Carlson next?<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-bXFZdFYhhn4/YEj6uqcEWWI/AAAAAAAAEJs/guzrCb6clwc8bLgxahp8LdP-gejRuRTMACNcBGAsYHQ/burger-king-women-in-kitchen-2021.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="765" data-original-width="1360" height="362" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-bXFZdFYhhn4/YEj6uqcEWWI/AAAAAAAAEJs/guzrCb6clwc8bLgxahp8LdP-gejRuRTMACNcBGAsYHQ/w640-h362/burger-king-women-in-kitchen-2021.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>Umm, before you blow your top, find out what the rest of the ad says<p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Semi-literacy isn’t limited to knuckle-dragging Trumpsters. </b>It would seem that even some of us progressives can’t read more than five words before our brains turn to mush.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">A case in point: While trying to support women chefs in their careers, the Burger King Foundation tweeted out a <a href="https://www.adweek.com/media/burger-king-gets-grilled-for-women-belong-in-the-kitchen-tweet-supporting-female-chefs/?utm_content=position_1&utm_source=postup&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=BreakingNews_Newsletter_210308085058&lyt_id=432095">consciousness-raising ad</a> on International Women’s Day. It was headlined, “Women belong in the kitchen.” Those who were competent to read more than the five-word headline without developing a migraine or calling for their smelling salts would have discovered that the copy went on to say, “Fine dining kitchens, food truck kitchens, casual dining kitchens, ghost kitchens, Burger King kitchens. If there’s a professional kitchen, women belong here.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And it <i>then</i> went on to say, “But can you guess who’s heading those kitchens these days? Exactly. Only 24% of chef positions in America are occupied by women. Want to talk head chefs? The number drops to fewer than 7%.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">The ad went on to talk about a “commitment from one of the biggest restaurants in the world to help aspiring female chefs” with scholarships, “Because every woman with a passion deserves the choice to advance, whether it’s in culinary school, a Burger King Kitchen, or any other kitchen in the world.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">I say hurrah! But some of my fellow progressives, who evidently develop muscle cramps in their lips after struggling through a five-word headline in big type, had such furious meltdowns that Burger King folded, apologized, and declared that the tweet was “wrong.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">So I guess there is no place for women chefs after all, eh Burger King?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Now the advertising community is getting its knickers in a twist, cautioning against what boils down to the use of clever attention-getting headlines. They may have discovered, alas, that while idiots generally makes more noise on the right, ultimately the entire human race is a race of nincompoops.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Freedom to distress.</b> My first four grownup jobs involved reporting for newspapers —a chain of suburban weeklies, a small town daily, a big city daily, and the weeklies again, that last time as their editor — before deciding that I needed to make a living. That led me to a frivolous but much-better-paid life in advertising. However, I’ve always strongly favored unfettered freedom of the press. Leave it to the Brits to sour me on my own cause.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">I’m talking about the distress inflicted on Meghan Markle — and no, this is <i>not</i> about the Oprah interview. Well <i>before </i>that, the Mail On Sunday (that’s the name of a British tabloid) published a private letter Meghan wrote to her father. And then milked, and milked, and milked the contents of the letter and commentary about it to sell newspapers. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Now the judge in a British High Court (whatever that is) has ordered the <a href="https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-56296835">Mother Of All Confessions</a>. It’s a statement that The Mail On Sunday infringed Meghan Markle’s copyright on a letter than the court said was, “personal and private”. The statement must appear on the front page. And on page 3, “for a period of one week.” <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Wait, there’s more! The online version of the newspaper must also publish the statement for a week, with a link to the court’s “full judgment.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">The judge’s ruling in part said:</span></p><p style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></p><blockquote><p style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;">"The defendant devoted a very considerable amount of space to the infringing articles, which it continued to publish for over two years."<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; vertical-align: baseline;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-stretch: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-variant-caps: inherit; line-height: inherit; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;">"It has devoted a very considerable number of further column inches, and many hundreds if not thousands of words, to coverage of earlier stages of this litigation and commentary upon them.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; vertical-align: baseline;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;">"The wording sought is modest by comparison and factual in nature."</span></p></blockquote><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">To which I might add, let’s remember what freedom of the press is for. It’s for conveying information and opinions in pursuit of a civil society and good government. It’s not for prying into and often ruining private lives so you can up your circulation and charge more for your advertising.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>A pregnant thought for Tucker Carlson.</b> Over at No More Mister Nice Blog, Steve M. reports on Tucker Carlson’s Fox-y outrage machine all but bursting into flames about a report concerning the Air Force and pregnant women in its ranks.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">“Pregnant women are going to fight our wars,” fumes Carlson. “It’s a mockery of the U.S. Military.” And he blames it on Joe Biden. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Of course he does. Even though it’s a lie.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">No More Mister Nice Blog <a href="https://nomoremister.blogspot.com/2021/03/i-can-assure-your-right-wing-relatives.html#disqus_thread">points out</a> that the “maternity flight suits” that are getting Tucker’s knickers in a twist were all announced under the Trump administration. And “VileWhig,” who commented on the No More Mister post added, “Anyone who thinks flight suits are for dropping into enemy territory doesn’t know the difference between flight crews and paratroopers.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Another comment, from “brucej” noted that the change applied to remotely piloted aircrew, missile operations duty crews,” which are desk jobs.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">“We’re back into the days of poutrage over tan suits, Dijon mustard and arugla lettuce again, aren’t we,” asks brucej.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Ya think? Wait, I’ll ask Mr. Potato Head.</span><o:p></o:p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-24392088546135265142021-03-04T12:28:00.003-05:002021-03-05T10:21:25.491-05:00Trump hacked! Pizza Guy smacked! Big bank rats out wreckers and rioters! So who says there’s nothing but bad news these days?<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-9Vcjc--MWJg/YEETovyCvWI/AAAAAAAAEJc/vNIvmH-PA1Eysxn1yn2RD5Jq3K1hZu7zgCNcBGAsYHQ/s1200/PizzaRat.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="865" data-original-width="1200" height="290" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-9Vcjc--MWJg/YEETovyCvWI/AAAAAAAAEJc/vNIvmH-PA1Eysxn1yn2RD5Jq3K1hZu7zgCNcBGAsYHQ/w400-h290/PizzaRat.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /> What do you get when you combine a story about an irate Pizza CEO with one about a bank ratting out its customers?<p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b> </b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">I’m writing this on Thursday, March 4<sup>th</sup>. This is the day Q-Anoners believe that He is risen — “He” being Donald Trump, of course.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Today, they say, He will somehow transmogrify from a bitter presidential has-been in Margo Fargo or Wherever-the-hell-it's-called in Florida, to a bitter political has-been who will be miraculously transported to Washington D.C. and reinstalled as President of the United States while Joe Biden walks the plank.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">I suspect this is scheduled for very late in the day, and might even get, umm, temporarily postponed. Since we will likely have a rather long wait for the sacred moment, during which your stomach may begin to rumble, here are a few tidbits to nibble on in the interim.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">Trump account gets painful thump<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>in 70-gigabite data dump!</b><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">It happened to Gab. That’s a social media platform where right-wing loonies are finding a haven, now that they’ve been effectively rousted from Twitter and Facebook. A massive 70 gigabites of data — 70 gigs! — including user data, private posts, secret messages, profiles, passwords, the whole ball of wax got, umm, copied from Gab’s inner innards and handed over to something called Distribute Denial of Secrets, the heir-apparent to WikiLeaks.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Trump signed up for a Gab account after he was suspended from Twitter back in January.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">I found this news at an online publication called Coindesk which usually concerns itself with techno-financial news about Bitcoin and Ethereum and other “digital currencies.” But I guess this story was too good for reporter Jamie Crawley to pass up. Including this tidbit:<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">“Data of former U.S. President Donald J. Trump’s account is included in the data hoard, according to and archived post by [Gab] CEO Andrew Torba. (WARNING: Contains offensive language.)” <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">You wouldn’t want to be offended by Torba’s language, which concerns what appears to me to be an unflattering reference to transsexuals, so out of tender concern for your sensibilities, <a href="https://www.coindesk.com/gab-refuge-for-the-deplatformed-hacked-for-pretty-much-everything-including-trump-data">I won’t give you this link</a>.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">Pizza Pie King cruelly crushed<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">(he sez) by marauding Mad man<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Before I lay this one out, allow me to express my personal ire at the way people are naming advertising agencies these days. Back when I drifted from newspaper city rooms (as news rooms were then called) to ad agencies, it was pretty easy to know who was running the candy store. Ogilvy was run by a guy named David Ogilvy. Burnett was run by a guy named Leo Burnett. Batten Barton Durstine and Osborne was…well, you get the idea.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">But now? Evidently the more opaquely smartass an ad agency name is, the better. There is, or was, one called Razorfish. And no, there’s no Mr. or Ms. Razorfish. In London there’s Mad Dogs and Englishman. And now there’s an ad agency somewhere in the U.S.A. called Laundry Service. (Get it, get it,<i> nudge nudge</i>? I don’t.)<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Anyway, Laundry Service is or was the ad agency for the Papa John’s Pizza chain. The founder of Papa John’s was a dude named John Schnatter, who had a possibly racist meltdown (ya think?) over NFL players taking a knee during the National Anthem. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://www.chicagotribune.com/business/ct-biz-papa-johns-apologizes-nfl-anthem-protests-20171115-story.html">The Chicago Tribune reported</a> back in 2017 that Schnater blamed puny pizza sales on the kneeling NFL players. (Papa John’s was a major advertiser of NFL games). The protests “should have been nipped in the bud a year and a half ago,” the Trib had Schnatter ranting.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Next thing you know, Schnatter gets booted (or “resigns” take your pick) from the company he founded. Now he’s suing Laundry Service, claiming, in essence that they plotted against him. In a complaint that is either completely ridiculous, or living proof that truth is stranger than paranoia, Schnatter alleges that Laundry Service employees came up with some kind of malicious plan for Schnatter “to have an hourlong live interview with a hostile media personality and prompt Mr. Schnatter to make damaging statements which need ‘to be viral.’”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">This comes from Ad Age (sometimes the best news is in industry trade journals.) Ad Age reports in part:<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"></span></span></p><blockquote><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">“</span>Laundry Service immediately began to discuss how Mr. Schnatter’s statements on the call could be used against him to damage his image so ‘he gets fucking sent out to pasture on this shit’ (in Stein’s words),” the complaint reads.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">[snip]<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="inline-ad-para" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 26.25pt; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;">“The chilling details from this taped conversation make clear the intent of Laundry Service to destroy my reputation, as well as the Papa John’s brand, harming our employees and franchisees in the process,” Schnatter said in the statement. </span></p></blockquote><p class="inline-ad-para" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 26.25pt; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></p><p class="inline-ad-para" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 26.25pt; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;">Because, of course, that’s exactly what advertising agencies clients hire them to do.There’s more, and I think the Ad Age pay wall will let you past once or twice, if you are intelligent enough to <a href="https://adage.com/article/agency-news/papa-johns-founder-alleges-former-laundry-service-ceo-caught-tape-conspiring-send-him-out-pasture/2319051?utm_source=ad-age-news-alerts&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=20210303&utm_content=hero-headline">peruse the rest of this tale.</a> </span></p><p class="inline-ad-para" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 26.25pt; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Got feds combing through your </b><b>dirty underwear? Thank the bank.</b></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Back to Coindesk again, which ran an article about Bank of America with a “trigger warning” that, “This column has something nice to say about Tucker Carlson.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Seems that the motherTucker broke a story saying that since the January 6th insurrection on Capitol Hill, the Bank of America has been “helping federal investigators search for extremists by combing through its transaction records.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">So, Insurrection Dude, if you were in Washington D.C. on January 5<sup>th</sup> and 6<sup>th</sup> and whipped out your B of A credit card, paid for a hotel or Air BnB reservation, “bought weapons anything else” (including T-shirts) from a “weapons-related merchant” between January 7<sup>th</sup> and January 20<sup>th</sup>, or made “airline-related purchases” after January 6<sup>th</sup> not only to Washington but to anywhere from Omaha to Thailand….you are so screwed!<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">For details on how you can’t even get away with a little bitty thing like smashing down the Capitol doors and trying to lynch your congressman, <a href="https://www.coindesk.com/money-reimagined-tucker-carlson-financial-privacy">see the Coindesk article here.</a></span><o:p></o:p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-67710791992965281782021-02-24T18:08:00.001-05:002021-02-24T18:08:34.186-05:00Bing! Bang! Boom! You’re dead! He’s dead! She’s dead! Everybody’s dead! (But it’s worth it for the great swag I got from the NRA!)<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-AvW5Cpi_FDY/YDbWH5tZqtI/AAAAAAAAEJQ/boFIEoIUHD4N7VA9KM-vOablHkR7JD9bQCNcBGAsYHQ/s600/mail.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="244" data-original-width="600" height="163" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-AvW5Cpi_FDY/YDbWH5tZqtI/AAAAAAAAEJQ/boFIEoIUHD4N7VA9KM-vOablHkR7JD9bQCNcBGAsYHQ/w400-h163/mail.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"> I mean, isn’t this cool stuff <i>worth</i> a few measly lives?<o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">News from all over!<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">•<b>In France,</b> a 25 year old Brit who had been living in France got to die in France near his home there, when a hunter<a href="https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-9015185/British-expat-shot-dead-French-hunter-mistook-boar.html"> “mistook him for a boar.”</a> The English guy was chopping wood in front of his house when the hunter’s bullet whacked him. Hey, I totally get it. A guy with an axe chopping logs looks exactly like a tusked pig with four legs digging for truffles. No need to explain any further.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">•<b>Near Metairie, LA</b>, at a place called the Jefferson Gun Outlet, some dude with a gun entered, which seems logical to me. But then, according to news reports, <a href="https://www.wdsu.com/article/jefferson-parish-officials-will-provide-update-on-gun-range-shooting-that-killed-3-in-metairie/35585943#">the dude started squeezing the trigger</a>, and it would seem that he was shooting at live people, not targets. Whereupon, the armed staff and customers began shooting back at the dude. Holy flying bullets, Batman! In the end, two men and a woman were dead, two of them customers. Well, <i>three</i> of them customers if you count the dude who allegedly started shooting first. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">•<b>Back to France,</b> somewhere <i>else</i> in France where — whee! — a shooter nailed another Englishman. Well, a Welshman, but even so. See, the Welshman was riding his bicycle on a popular route in the French Alps, when the hunter nailed him. And you’ll never guess what <i>this</i> Frenchmen said. You ready for it?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Right! You’re right!</b> He said that when he plugged the biking Welshman, he thought he was shooting a boar. Whoever the guy is in France who’s been training boars to chop wood and ride ten speeds, he must be a genius.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">•<b>Back to the USA,</b> <a href="https://www.aftermath.com/content/accidental-shooting-deaths-statistics/"> stats last year</a> revealed that 92 people were killed unintentionally by kids as of October, 2020. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">•<b>Of course, that’s a piffle</b> compared to the total number of gun-related deaths in the USA in 2018. (39,740 of them.) I have been unable to determine how many of those people killed by guns were mistaken for boars. Or how many were riding bicycles.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Which brings me to a letter from the NRA.</b> It popped up in my e-mail this week. It’s way too long to quote in full. Take my word that most of it seems intended to convince you that mild-mannered Joe Biden is secretly Satan incarnate, complete with horns, a tail, and claws that have specially evolved to grab guns from Second Amendment true believers. But here are some of the juicy bits, in italics:<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><i><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><i><span style="font-size: large;">Dear Crank,<o:p></o:p></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><i><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><i>No matter what kind of firearm you own, Joe Biden’s anti-gun agenda is aimed squarely at YOU.</i><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Who? Moi?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><i><span style="font-size: large;">Joe Biden has said flat-out that he wants to LICENSE you, REGISTER your guns, punish you with huge gun and ammo TAXES, and RATION the number of firearms you’re allowed to buy.<o:p></o:p></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><i><span style="font-size: large;"> <o:p></o:p></span></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Well, no wonder people are taking umbrage! All those SCREAMING CAPITAL LETTERS! They turn the NRA into a howling ringer for <a href="https://thenewyorkcrank.blogspot.com/2020/08/trump-girlfriend-kimberly-guilfoyle.html">Kimberly Guilfoyle</a>!<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Besides, what’s the point of standing next to a nuclear reactor until my DNA mutates, and then growing 25 arms, if I can’t have a gun in each arm? See what I mean?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><i><u>Crank, Joe Biden is coming for the guns in your gun safe right now.</u></i><u><o:p></o:p></u></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><u><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></u></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Well, NRA, they’re sure as hell not going to get any guns from <i>my</i> safe.</b> I leave all my weaponry out on the coffee table so the kids can play with them. Not to mention that they're handier there for shooting wild boar from the living room window whenever the boars bike by.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And hey, the NRA's letter told me that if I start my membership before a deadline, I’ll get my "CHOICE" of an NRA pocketknife with a handle made out of exactly the same kind of wood they make gun stocks from. Wow, wow, wow!</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Or if the wood-handled pocket knife doesn’t float my boat</b>, I can choose instead a "3-in-1 Rechargeable NRA flashlight," an NRA Insignia Cap, or an NRA “Camo Duffel Bag,” possibly so I can go unseen to the next insurrection in Washington.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">I’m sold, NRA. But you’ll have to excuse me now. A friend just called and told me that any minute, a whole bunch of boars wearing bicycle jerseys are going to come pedaling past my window. So lock and load!<o:p></o:p></span></p><p><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"> </span> </p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-7457991686018309762021-02-19T12:00:00.002-05:002021-02-19T12:39:28.814-05:00Where are they now? A peek into the future of the former Trump administration.<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-l3MuL-vg0VU/YC_rqu8LdPI/AAAAAAAAEJA/kcmsGGSsuTQQGbULLjcTR6u0U76jsSXcwCNcBGAsYHQ/s426/Gypsy-CrystalBall.JPG" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="426" data-original-width="276" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-l3MuL-vg0VU/YC_rqu8LdPI/AAAAAAAAEJA/kcmsGGSsuTQQGbULLjcTR6u0U76jsSXcwCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/Gypsy-CrystalBall.JPG" /></a></div><p> "I see the future and it tickles."</p><span style="font-size: large;"> <i style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">The following is an excerpt from a soon-to-be-founded magazine, Popular Politics, July 2025 edition, that we’ve obtained through astral projection. The New York Crank makes no warranty as to the reliability of that magazine’s reporting.</i></span><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Melania Trump</b> is working as a chambermaid in a run down tourist hotel in Slovenia after a well-publicized attempt to become an interior decorator didn’t pan out. She is rumored to be working with a ghostwriter on a book entitled Never Sign A Pre-Nup.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Donald Trump</b> will be eligible for parole in another 32 months. He has occasionally been seen exchanging ideas in the exercise yard with Bernie Madoff.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Steve Miller</b> is working as a transvestite dominatrix in a Virginia bordello.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Sarah Huckabee Sanders, Stephanie Grisham, Kayleigh McEnanany, and Kellyanne Conway </b> are partners in a struggling PR firm located in Truth or Consequences, New Mexico. (Yes, there <a href="https://www.sierracountynewmexico.info/truth-or-consequences/">really is</a> a Truth or Consequences, New Mexico.)<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Kimberley Guilfoyle</b> is a traveling carnival barker.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">Steve Bannon</b><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"> runs a resort and fat farm for the well-to-do in the Berkshire Mountains of Massachusetts. He is often seen jogging on Route 7, followed by a slow-moving truck equipped with an oxygen tank and a defibrillator. <o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Peter Navarro</b> is now a country and western singer, known for his yodeling.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Donald Jr. and Eric Trump </b>work as decoys at a paintball firing range. Junior was recently detained by police for six hours when they mistook him for a stolen Jackson Pollock painting.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump</b> have sold their real estate holdings to raise money for what they predict will be a blockbuster movie entitled, “War and Peace: The Musical!” College friends of Jared’s wrote the book and the lyrics, including one called “Everybody here has the hots for Natasha,:The prettiest girl who ever climbed the Steppes,” as well as the theme song: “War and Peace.” Somebody was kind enough to slip us the lyrics:<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">War and Peace<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Will it never cease?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">First there’s peace<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And then there’s war<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And then we have some <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Peace some more<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And then again another war<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And then...</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And then...</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And then... </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And then there’s peace.” <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">In addition to co-producing the film with Jared, Ivanka plans to direct the movie herself and will also star as Natasha.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Louis DeJoy</b> is still Postmaster General of the United States. There’s some stuff you just <a href="https://www.latimes.com/business/story/2021-02-09/louis-dejoy-still-postmaster">can’t make up</a>.</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p> </o:p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-75959977953283574542021-02-17T19:17:00.003-05:002021-02-18T09:57:40.889-05:00Modest proposals concerning statues, the weather, Tom Friedman, and Wyoming — plus an honorable mention for the Texas power grid<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-76ksd3QHyFc/YC2q-UA5_BI/AAAAAAAAEIw/Ml1Y5_BP6wYY6NU4ZSRSWnoQtOZW_AP5QCNcBGAsYHQ/s2048/IMG_1168.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" height="300" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-76ksd3QHyFc/YC2q-UA5_BI/AAAAAAAAEIw/Ml1Y5_BP6wYY6NU4ZSRSWnoQtOZW_AP5QCNcBGAsYHQ/w400-h300/IMG_1168.jpeg" width="400" /></a></div>License plate recently seen in New York City. On a Beamer, of course. It has nothing to do with anything else here. Just sayin'.<p></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: #333333;">A modestly proposed solution to the statue problem:</span></b><span style="color: #333333;"> You know the statue problem. Although I’m not aware of any statue census, I’m willing to bet that half the statuary (museums excluded) in the United States are either of Confederate generals or people who in some way were racist. And the list keeps expanding. And every time you tear a statue down, there’s a roar of bleating and protest. <o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">So I have a thought. Instead of tearing down Confederate statues, erect statues of Satan next to each of them. Hey, you have your statues, Satanists have their statues, everybody’s got a hero to worship, and we can all go home. <o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">What’s that? People are going to get tired of looking at all the Satan statues next to all the Robert E. Lee statues? Tell you what. Here and there, put up <a href="https://www.123rf.com/photo_143986987_ancient-statue-of-priapus-symbol-of-the-fertility-in-pompeii.html">a statue of Priapus</a> instead. <o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p><span style="font-size: large;"> <b style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="color: #333333;">The Crank’s Theory of Planetary Instability.</span></b><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"> It's freezing and snowing in Texas, where with the juice turned off (more about that further on) it’s colder than in parts of Alaska.</span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">How can that be?<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">I’m not willing to say the magic words “climate change” and leave it at that. I have a theory that if near the Arctic Circle summer temperatures now can reach a scorching 99 degrees, while Texas feels and looks like Alaska, something else is going on. Nope, not a secret plot. An unintended consequence of….<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">Effing fracking! <o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">Wait a damn second! Don’t turn your back and snicker! Listen up! Just suppose that all those repeated underground explosions knocked the earth off its axis. Remember, it’s not just a little bang here and a little bang there. It’s a bunch of big booming bangs, week after week, year after year, place after place down below.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">So the shaken earth rotates in some crazy manner and the next thing you know, Texas is at a latitude where Alaska used to be, and Alaska’s where the Equator used to be. I don’t know about you, but some people may be buying beachfront property in Nome.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Why oh why Wyoming? </b>When is the world (or at least The New York Times) going to do something about Tom Friedman of The New York Times? From as far back as I can remember reading him, he’s been saying things that, while not obnoxious, and not fearsomely objectionable, are just the slightest bit off-kilter.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Examples? Quite a few years ago, before a certain Israeli Prime Minister fell into a pit of corruption, Friedman was more or less regularly addressing his columns to “Bibi.” As if Benjamin Netanyahu woke up every morning and looked for Friedman’s column in the Times before he even went to pee. Some time after that, Friedman wrote a book called “The World Is Flat,” (which meant, I think, that people communicate faster these days — which Friedman evidently thoughtwas a huge discovery) and he seemed to use the phrase in every last damn self-promotional column until I wanted to vomit.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;">Now Friedman’s making pronouncements about cancer that ain’t necessarily so. Specifically? </span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;">“<span style="color: #333333;">The fact that one of our two national parties would stick with a leader who dispatched a mob to ransack the Capitol in hopes of overturning our last election is an acute national problem — a cancer, in fact. And like any cancer, the required treatment is going to be painful for the patient,” <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2021/02/16/opinion/republican-party-democracy.html?action=click&module=Opinion&pgtype=Homepage">he writes. </a><o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">Oh yeah, Mister Know-It-All? Well, I happen to have a form of cancer called Leukemia, and the treatment thus far consists of painlessly swallowing two pills a day. I’m not saying that many cancer patients aren’t in pain. I’m just saying that once again, you’ve made a pompous universal declaration that is four-tenths bonafide baloney. Nor would your proposals to “cure” this cancer be particularly “painful” to me. In fact, I’d be delighted by your proposed act that would get rid of the Senate filibuster, grant the District of Columbia and Puerto Rico statehood, and “forbids voter suppression.”<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><span style="caret-color: rgb(51, 51, 51);">While</span> I find all three prospect pleasurable, not painful, I confess it’s a neat trick if you can do it. But about Wyoming….<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">Friedman correctly states that D.C. and Puerto Rico each have more U.S. citizens than Wyoming. Sheesh! So does Brooklyn. So does Queens. Should they each be their own state?<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">I have a better idea. Eliminate Wyoming’s statehood. Now <i>there’s</i> a proposal that’ll cause some <i>real </i>pain. Give part of Wyoming to Colorado, part to Montana, and part to Idaho. That’ll bring the population of those states closer into line with those of California and New York, which also only have two Senators each. Or rewrite the U.S. Constitution. I imagine that would cause some pain, too.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #333333;"><b>And speaking of Texas…</b>Well, I did <i>mention</i> Texas a bit earlier when I was talking about Wobbly Fracked Earth Climate Change. But also, Texas is </span><span style="color: #333333;">the state that refused to have anything to do with the other two major power systems in the United States because <a href="https://juanitajean.com/freezing-in-the-dark/">Free Enterprise</a>. As for tight <a href="https://www.wonkette.com/texas-deep-freeze">Texas government regulation</a> of the utilities…<i>what</i>? You mean <i>socialism?</i><o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">So you had a bunch of utility companies that didn’t do what it takes to protect the Texas power supply from nature because, hell, nature’s probably some kind of socialism, too. And now most Texans are freezing their butts off, while others are paying dearly to stay warm.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">According to the Washington Post, “the temporary train wreck of that [Texas electrical] market Monday and Tuesday has seen the wholesale price of electricity in Houston go from $22 a megawatt-hour to about $9,000.”<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">Now I’m going to do some back-of-the-envelope figuring here. That about a 409 times increase in prices, wholesale. Let’s assume retail follows suit. So if you typically pay, say, sixty bucks a month to keep your lights, and your heat, and your electric refrigerator, and your phone recharger on in Texas, you’re now going to have to pay over $24,500. Now <i>there’s</i> an electric bill that’s as BIG as Texas!<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">The <i>good</i> news is, that a heck of a lot of Texans will probably pay a lot less than that because they don’t have any electricity to pay for.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333; font-size: 14pt;"><br /></span></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-16147075748999346392021-02-10T14:45:00.009-05:002021-02-11T09:41:31.587-05:00A name by any other name would smell as nomenclatural<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vSm50L4vPU4/YCQ0hBO0AoI/AAAAAAAAEIg/GWYl0QqJFNYXq3N7etYMatNXDb24gosxACNcBGAsYHQ/s992/Image.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="558" data-original-width="992" height="225" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vSm50L4vPU4/YCQ0hBO0AoI/AAAAAAAAEIg/GWYl0QqJFNYXq3N7etYMatNXDb24gosxACNcBGAsYHQ/w400-h225/Image.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; text-align: start;">Who’s the pearl of a genius who thought up this name?</i></div><br /><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">As I sit writing this, the Senate of the United States (I assume this since I’m not watching at the moment) is effectively deliberating how to label the events of January 6</span><sup style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">th</sup><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">. They will listen to evidence. Then they will decide whether by telling his followers to march on the Capitol, “take back America” and “fight like hell” for Donald Trump’s right to overturn a legitimate election, Trump should be labeled as having a) incited a riot or b) merely exercised his First Amendment rights to free speech.</span></span><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Right, and all those rioting people bent on lynching legislators and other acts of violence merely transmogrified out of dandruff and horse hairs floating in the Washington Monument reflecting pool.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">But no further comment from me on that today. Not that you need any. Instead, let me delve into a few other exercises in the fine art of abusing nomenclature.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">“Aunt Jemima” was clearly a racist brand name. But the new name’s just dumb. </b><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">Whether because racist intention or more likely mere stupidity, the image of “Aunt Jemima” the overweight house slave in the kitchen that appeared on a leading brand of pancake flour and syrup, perpetrated an awful racial stereotype. Such stereotyping has no place in American commerce. </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">So hurrah that the Quaker Oats Company, the maker of the product, finally got its guano together and <a href="https://www.adweek.com/brand-marketing/aunt-jemima-is-now-officially-the-pearl-milling-company/?utm_content=lead&utm_source=postup&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=FirstThingsFirst_Newsletter_210210055058&lyt_id=1418357">changed the name</a>.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span>But what marketing genius came up with "Pearl Milling Company" as the replacement? It's racism-free </span><span> — except that they mention on the new label that it's still "Aunt Jemima," just in case you're not sure</span><span>. And it's also personality-free.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">How about Quaker pancake flour? Or if that sullies either the company’s image or the Society of Friends, how about <i>anything</i> else? Dan’s Dandy Pancake Flour. Pancake Pete’s Fluffy Flour. Power Flour for Pancakes. Or even — what the hell!— steal or license a brand name from Wylie Coyote and make it Acme Pancake Flour. At least I can remember that.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">What’s sad is, if the brand with a now totally forgettable mouthful of a name flops after all these years, some right-wing yoyos are going to blame it on “cancel culture” having forced the name change. And that will aid and abet, not neutralize, the advocates of racism. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">But speaking of cancel culture…<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Sorry, Abe, and George, and Tom and Jim and Diane. You’re cancelled! </b></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Alas, I regret to say that members of my own progressive crowd have gone off the deep end without their water wings.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://www.sacbee.com/news/nation-world/national/article248800685.html">A report</a> out of San Francisco tells me that forty-four schools throughout the city will be renamed, by order of the local school board, because they are named after historical figures who “engaged in the subjugation and enslavement of human beings; or who oppressed women, inhibiting social progress; or whose actions led to genocide; or who otherwise significantly diminished the opportunities of those amongst us to the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness."<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Holy cow! You mean San Francisco had schools named after Jefferson Davis and Robert E. Lee? Or was there an Attila the Hun School, a Simon Legree Vocational High School of Slave Abuse, a Jeffrey Dahmer Mass Murder Preparatory School, and an Adolph Hitler High?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Nope. The San Francisco school board is now horrified that its schools are named after Abraham Lincoln, George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, James Madison and Senator Diane Feinstein, among others.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>Abe Lincoln?</i></b> Well, yeah, because he backed policies that harmed Native American Tribes. And George Washington owned slaves. And Diane Feinstein — get this — “<a href="https://www.aol.com/lifestyle/san-francisco-school-board-sparks-163435787.html">has been accused</a> (accused!) of ordering a Confederate flag to be replaced after it was torn down, when she was Mayor of San Francisco back in the 1980s.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">The Roosevelt Middle School will also be renamed, even though the school board isn’t certain which Roosevelt the school was named for, Teddy or Franklin. (Or maybe Eleanor?) Paul Revere is about to ride off into San Francisco-imposed oblivion. And on and on goes the purge.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">Listen, it’s one thing to avoid naming schools or monuments after traitors to the United States such as Jefferson Davis, who betrayed his country to preserve human slavery. Or to eschew monuments to rabble rousers, race baiters and thugs. But there’s no such thing as a perfect human being. Was Lincoln wrong to allow conquest of Native American lands, if he did so? </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">You bet he was. Damn wrong. But he also kept the union together and ended the abomination of slavery, and in the end that has to count for </span><i style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">something </i><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">worth memorializing, one supposes. <o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">What did Paul Revere do wrong? I duno. According to <a href="http://history.com">history.com</a>, he had kind of a spotty military record. He commanded American soldiers against some British forces in Maine, but his forces “failed to attack in time” and British reinforcements arrived, forcing an American retreat. Revere was charged with cowardice and insubordination and booted out of the militia. (But he was acquitted in 1782. So go figure.)<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">“It’s not just symbolic. It’s a moral message,” said Mark Sanchez, a member of the school board. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">But perhaps that’s exactly the problem.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Flat out, clear cut, deliberate evil should deservedly get purged from places of honor. Morality, on the other hand, is a a fluid and tricky concept. There are some things we can all agree are immoral, like murder, or rape, or deliberate genocide. But there are other things where someone with a liberal turn-of-mind might allow for shades of gray.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">It’s only a few decades ago that being gay was immoral. There were people who were raised thinking masturbation was immoral. Or failing to attend church.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Your immorality may be my right to self-expression. Is San Francisco’s own <a href="https://www.sfchronicle.com/bayarea/article/Margo-St-James-the-sex-workers-Joan-of-15868822.php">Margo St. James</a>, recently deceased, (and called "San Francisco's Joan of Arc") a saint who started a movement to protect and liberate sex workers? Or is “sex work” by definition immoral and its organizers like St. James worthy of nothing but opprobrium? <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>It's a long, hard slog</b> if you search for high achievers who are perfectly moral by everybody's standards. With few exceptions the only morally perfect people are nonentities. And after a while the exceptions will run out. Sadly, it's likely that after <i>that</i>, some of the exceptions will be discovered to have had some unexceptional flaws. I can’t imagine what they might be — anything from cheating on exams, to hidden cases of child abuse, to nose picking.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">The problem with naming schools only after morally perfect people is that it’s a perfect way to begin naming schools after mediocrities. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Not that I’d have anything against a Hermione J. Nebbish High School. Or a Morton J. Schlub Middle School. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Right, Mr., uh….what’s the name of that guy on the San Francisco School Board again?</span><o:p></o:p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-80311901606607627612021-02-07T14:06:00.009-05:002021-02-07T15:06:37.232-05:00“Vax THIS!” or, You Can’t Be Too Vulnernable to COVID-19. Or Too Stupid.<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DU91wlGwAnE/YCA1XlnL-xI/AAAAAAAAEII/9j5XF-ZCup0kZAuyEaKw46NtZYD7u3t8gCNcBGAsYHQ/s602/2149.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="602" data-original-width="600" height="400" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DU91wlGwAnE/YCA1XlnL-xI/AAAAAAAAEII/9j5XF-ZCup0kZAuyEaKw46NtZYD7u3t8gCNcBGAsYHQ/w399-h400/2149.jpeg" width="399" /></a></div><br /> <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">Image lifted from my favorite photography website, <a href="http://PeopleOfWalmart.com">PeopleOfWalmart.com</a></span><p></p><p><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>And so the insanity continues</b>. Back on January 15<sup>th</sup>, I posted <a href="https://thenewyorkcrank.blogspot.com/2021/01/in-new-york-city-were-being-urged-to.html">here</a> about the infuriating difficulties I faced, as an immune-compromised 81-year-old, trying to get a COVID 19 immunization in New York. This despite the fact that I’m in a high priority group.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">It’s now February 7<sup>th</sup>, and although I make almost daily attempts to get on a vaccine reservation list somewhere in New York, <i>still</i> no luck. Yes, a <i>few</i> of my peers have gotten their shots in out-of-the-way locations. But no matter how eligible you might be, catching an immunization in New York City is like going fishing with an un-baited hook and hoping a fish will accidently collide with it and somehow get stuck to the sharp part.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">I’ve written to Governor Cuomo, explaining my plight. Almost immediately I got an auto-reply telling me my letter would be read with great interest by members of his staff. But thus far, no live human from the Governor’s staff has been in touch to signal someone with a heartbeat is aware of the problem and working to help senior citizens get immunized before the virus kills us off. Or perhaps the computer “forgot” to pass my letter along. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>But I did land on the governor’s junk mail list.</b> Now I receive almost daily e-mails from Cuomo telling me what a great, superb, super-duper job he’s doing handling the pandemic. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">In other words, “Screw you, Crank — and all the senior citizens you rode in with.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">On top of that, every time the pool of eligible vaccine candidates creeps even a millimeter towards shrinking toward a manageable size, somebody expands the crowd. Here in New York City, they’ve now added taxi drivers as a category to compete for the horribly limited supply of vaccine with us old, frail, and therefore highly vulenerable types.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><b>To vax? Or anti-vax? That is the question.</b> While vulernable people futilely searching for vaccines tremble in fear, the New York Times this Sunday morning <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2021/02/06/us/california-covid-vaccine.html?action=click&module=Spotlight&pgtype=Homepage">ran an article</a> about anti-vaxxers, whose numbers in California evidently include people presumably educated enough to know better, in affluent communities like Beverly Hills and Santa Monica. Some random quotes from the Times piece (and please forgive the weird line spacing and undulating paragraph widths, courtesy of Google's buggy new "improvements" to Blogger):<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span></p><blockquote><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">But in the past two years, and in the months of the coronavirus pandemic, there has been an uptick in confrontational and threatening tactics.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="caret-color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 1.875rem; margin: 0.9375rem; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">They assaulted a lawmaker in Sacramento and threw menstrual blood onto legislators in the Senate chambers at the State Capitol in 2019, and last spring helped pressure the chief health officer in Orange County to resign by publicly revealing the official’s home address. Last month, two weeks before the stadium vaccination protest, a group of women threatened lawmakers at a budget hearing at the Capitol, telling senators that they were “not taking your shot” and that they “didn’t buy guns for nothing.”</span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">“I think the thing that’s most concerning is that they’re escalating,” said State Senator Richard Pan, a pediatrician and Democrat who wrote vaccination legislation. Mr. Pan was struck in the back in 2019 by an anti-vaccine activist and was the likely target of the blood-throwing incident in the Senate chambers that year.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="caret-color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 1.875rem; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">“This movement not only puts out mis- or disinformation about vaccines or lies about vaccines, which in itself can be harmful, but they are also aggressively bullying, threatening and intimidating people who are trying to share accurate information about vaccines,” he said.</span></span></p></blockquote><p class="css-axufdj" style="caret-color: rgb(51, 51, 51); font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-stretch: inherit; line-height: 1.875rem; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; max-width: 100%; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">Why is it that the most appropriate quote that comes to mind comes from Bubba Gump? “Stupid is as stupid does.”<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><span style="color: #333333;">Best <i>bon mot</i> of the week</span></b><span style="color: #333333;"> also comes from the <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2021/02/05/opinion/fossil-fuel-oil-climate-change.html">New York Times.</a> “</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #333333;">America’s political and media classes today could turn a bologna sandwich into a culture war issue.”</span><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">Unfortunately, aphorisms about transmogrifying fatty meats into tangible action don’t always work. A grand jury might indict a ham sandwich, but no New York grand jury has yet to indict Donald Trump for the financial crimes he is <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2020/08/05/nyregion/trump-taxes-vance-deutsche-bank.html">alleged to have committed</a>.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-axufdj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">Well, I guess that if government was populated entirely by people with brilliant minds, we wouldn’t have had Donald Trump in the White House in the first place.</span><span style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p></o:p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-68750483575227118192021-01-31T01:32:00.010-05:002021-02-02T12:43:46.740-05:00Space Lasers of the Lost Ark and Other Nightmarish Visions Caused by Psychedelic Current Events<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-SpxpQJEpz_Q/YBZM646ku4I/AAAAAAAAEHw/g1ax2dEBjKEj9X9vXv4piaiSBkk2JVa2QCNcBGAsYHQ/s488/273-2733565_free-to-use-public-domain-flying-saucer-clip.png" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="314" data-original-width="488" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-SpxpQJEpz_Q/YBZM646ku4I/AAAAAAAAEHw/g1ax2dEBjKEj9X9vXv4piaiSBkk2JVa2QCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/273-2733565_free-to-use-public-domain-flying-saucer-clip.png" width="320" /></a></div><br /> A laser-launching space ship captain watching out for Marjorie Taylor Greene<br /><p></p><p><span style="font-size: large;"> <span>Sorry that I’ve been missing from this blog for more than a
week. I’ve been tripping. A friend revealed that these days you can zonk out
merely by soaking newspapers in water, then blotting up the weird news and sucking on
it</span></span><span style="font-size: large;">.</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: large;">“Current events will trip you into the stratosphere,” said my old
hippy friend, who I hadn’t seen since 1968.</span></p><span style="font-size: large;"></span><span style="font-size: large;"> I tried it, and here are some of the visions
I’ve been tripping out on since.</span><span style="font-size: large;"></span><span style="font-size: large;"> </span><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Marjorie Taylor
Greene,</b> the Georgia Congresswoman and quintessential mean girl, who evidently knows where all the best
magic mushrooms are buried, as evidenced by her declaration that California
forest fires are caused by “Jewish lasers” in outer space, stands up in
Congress and repeats her charges. She has barely finished when a giant green
beam penetrates a window of the Capitol and slices her in half. </span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: large;">The unfortunately consequence of this is that now there are </span><span style="font-size: large;"><i>two</i><span> Marjorie Taylor Greene Congresswomen
talking about Jewish space lasers.</span><span> </span></span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>The Donald Trump
Combination Death Machine and Corn Popper Arrives. </b>One of Donald Trump’s final
vindictive acts was to alter Federal regulations so that capital prisoners may
now — or at least until President Biden reverses the order — be executed by
hanging, the gas chamber, a firing squad, or the electric chair. In a horrible
vision that woke me in the middle of the night screaming, Donald Trump was
sentenced to death by electrocution. But that’s not the part that woke me up
and made me scream.</span><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: large;">It seems that after they led Trump to the chair, strapped
him down and blindfolded him, somebody filled his mouth with unpopped popping corn.
And when they threw the switch…</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: large;">Well, the popping noise alone was horrible. A geyser of fresh popcorn shot out of Donald Trump’s head into baskets that had been placed on
the floor around the electric chair. When the execution was over, everybody
scooped up a bucket of the stuff and went to the movies. And damn if I didn’t
end up watching Freddy Kreuger doing his chain saw massacres again. <i>That’s</i> when I started screaming.</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>The My Pillow Guy</b>
becomes the plaintiff in a class action suit after it’s discovered that his
pillows contain lightweight, easily-inhaled microchips that after one night’s
sleep not only record our every movement but also record our conversations and
relay them to a powerful computer buried deep in a Colorado mountain. There, Donald
Trump’s agents sort through what we’ve said and transmit any anti-Trump
utterance to the Proud Boys.</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: large;">The plot is unmasked after the Proud Boys fatally beat up a
little old lady who in her sleep muttered “Screw Trump and the daughter he rode in on!” An inhaled microchip records the beating and six Proud boys
are tried, sentenced, and end up contributing ten thousand dollars worth of
popcorn to the national economy. Weeks later, the My Pillow Guy ends up on
television selling popcorn-filled pillows.</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>A mad scientist</b> steals
frozen embryos and then surreptitiously injects them into the noses of Ted
Cruz, Josh Hawley, Marco Rubio, Lindsey Graham, and Steve Scalise. Within a few
months, it becomes plainly and tragically evident that all these lawmakers are now pregnant ectopically, and that if they do not have abortions their noses
will explode. But when they seek an abortive procedure, a fuddy-duddy sheriff
shuts down the abortion clinic they are visiting and arrests everybody for
“attempted murder.”</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: large;">“I don’t know what they were snorting, but these pre-verts aren’t
going to kill innocent babies just because their noses are stuffy,” says the
sheriff.</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: large;">Fortunately for Cruz, Hawley <i>et al</i>, the case is rushed through the legal system to the Supreme
Court which rules that “these pregnancies are not natural” and that therefore
the abortions are not really abortions but “corrective surgical procedures” that may, in
fact, proceed.</span><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
</span><p class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-size: large;">Three weeks after that, Cruz, Hawley, Rubio, Graham and
Scalise are again seen in Washington, with remarkably tiny noses. They bristle
when Nancy Pelosi says, “I see you boys have had some work done.”</span></p><span style="font-size: large;">
<span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">A month after <i>that</i><span> </span>a woman with an ectopic
pregnancy of the nose is refused permission for an abortion by the Supreme
Court, which rules that the “not natural” condition it previously ruled on was pregnancy of
men, not pregnancy of the nose</span></span><span style="font-size: large;">
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{page:WordSection1;}</style> </span><br /></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-272387467558080442021-01-22T14:06:00.002-05:002021-01-22T16:08:51.550-05:00It ain’t over ‘till it’s over — and it ain’t over.<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-GUpXTG9EcSk/YAsbHcvdk2I/AAAAAAAAEHY/sW7iW62Xl702UuQzoboRs5dEcwczlxO_gCNcBGAsYHQ/s899/Monroe-Wax.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="899" data-original-width="600" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-GUpXTG9EcSk/YAsbHcvdk2I/AAAAAAAAEHY/sW7iW62Xl702UuQzoboRs5dEcwczlxO_gCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/Monroe-Wax.jpg" /></a></div> Marilyn Monroe rendered in wax. <br /><span style="font-size: large;"> </span><p></p><p><span style="font-size: large;"><b style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"><i>“Who do I have to blow to get <u>out</u> of this movie?”</i> — </b><i style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">Attributed to Marilyn Monroe on the set of The Misfits, her final film.</i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And so, the Raiders of the Lost Republic, who crashed into the Capitol Building a few weeks ago in search of legislators to kill, are getting arrested. Some of them.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">The only President of the United States who regularly put on makeup each day before he stepped out of his living quarters has fled to Florida.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">There's a sane, humane President with government experience in the White House at last. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">So, all’s right with the world, right?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Don’t you believe it. Not for a second. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">We woke up from the nightmare, but the nightmare is still there, behind us, close enough to be blowing in our ears and breathing down our necks. If we have any sense at all, our hearts are beating hard, our bedclothes are soaked with perspiration, and we’re likelier to be hyperventilating than celebrating.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">True, by getting Trump out of the White House, while keeping him off most of the social media, America has thrown a rock at a snake, and temporarily pinned him under it. Celebrate that. But do not let down your guard. <o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">He may wriggle out. Or somebody may lift the rock and free him. He may slither away, his skin a bit scraped, his odious excuse for a soul now more enraged than ever. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">But even if we’ve actually managed to silence him and send him into eternal and silent Florida exile, there are more where he came from.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">Ted Cruz, anybody? You’ll find him in the kitchen, probably, slathering oleaginous lubricant on his fangs and forked tongue. Care for some Josh Hawley? Or a few more years of Lauren Boebert, or Marjorie Taylor Green? Perhaps you’d enjoy House Republican leaders Steve Scalise and Kevin (“Weathervane”) McCarthy? And all the Republicans who signed on to an amicus brief to <a href="https://www.cnn.com/2020/12/10/politics/read-house-republicans-texas-supreme-court/index.html">overthrow</a> the results of the Presidential election? And Senators so squishy on their allegiance to the truth and the U.S. Constitution that they could squeeze through a keyhole, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4O2Ob1gVRU">like Lindsey Graham</a>?<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Or how about the laid-back and conscienceless Mowcow Mitch McConnell, who likes to bend law and custom to suit his needs. One day he’s staunchly defending the filibuster so that Democrats can get little or nothing done for America’s suffering people. The next, he’s tossing Senate customs in the dumpster (as when he withheld and held up judicial nominations during the Obama Administration, most notably among many that of Merrick Garland, on grounds that he later revoked when the shoe was on the other foot.)<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span>So no, it isn’t over. </span><span>Greed is eternal. The obscene lust for power for the sake of power is eternal. Corruption is eternal. The swamp, one thing — perhaps the only thing — that Donald Trump tagged accurately, is eternal. And for the moment, or perhaps for all of our lifetimes, swamp creatures cluster and mate around the Republican party.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">So be careful where, and for how long you sleep. The majority of Republicans will play Joe Biden’s comity card when it suits them. But they will reshuffle the deck and come at their fellow Americans fangs out when they care to, as well. And those fangs are venomous.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">This is a movie you can’t easily get out of. Nor its second run. Nor its third, fourth, fifth or five-hundredth.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Stay awake!</span><o:p></o:p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-11333893807358960322021-01-19T23:10:00.001-05:002021-01-19T23:10:30.310-05:00 USA TO TRUMP: You're fired! (And good riddance.)<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-aD7JucMWIlo/YAesMM-5MrI/AAAAAAAAEHI/zI7xEBdQZjIer9RgGhqPtXMn5PijcoSZQCNcBGAsYHQ/s800/Trump%252Cpng.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="752" data-original-width="800" height="376" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-aD7JucMWIlo/YAesMM-5MrI/AAAAAAAAEHI/zI7xEBdQZjIer9RgGhqPtXMn5PijcoSZQCNcBGAsYHQ/w400-h376/Trump%252Cpng.png" width="400" /></a></div><br /> <p></p><p><span style="font-size: x-large;">There will be no further comment from me on Inauguration Day.</span></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-33324068882236796042021-01-15T16:05:00.005-05:002021-01-15T20:02:00.372-05:00In New York City we’re being urged to get an inoculation against COVID-19. What inoculation?<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LDapWxShTH8/YAH-3KUdSVI/AAAAAAAAEGs/uIMVRo257OA1PghIiPz0Ijo-3MjUK0ibQCNcBGAsYHQ/s1320/morgue.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="742" data-original-width="1320" height="225" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LDapWxShTH8/YAH-3KUdSVI/AAAAAAAAEGs/uIMVRo257OA1PghIiPz0Ijo-3MjUK0ibQCNcBGAsYHQ/w400-h225/morgue.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>Another body gets loaded onto a refrigerator truck used as a morgue outside a New York City hospital. They say they're giving out COVID-19 inoculations now. Lotsa luck getting one.<br /> <p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">I’ve been trying for three days to get an appointment for a COVID-19 inoculation. I’m beginning to think I have a better chance of buying a winning Mega-Millions lottery ticket.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">My own doctors are at Weill-Cornell Medical Center, part of New York Presbyterian hospital. Weill-Cornell has a vast campus of hospital skyscrapers on the Upper East Side of Manhattan. New York Presbyterian has hospitals and sites in Washington Heights in upper Manhattan, and in lower Manhattan, and in the boroughs of Brooklyn and Queens. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">So where do they have their inoculation sites to help their patients from three of the city’s five boroughs?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><b>One cheesy, out-of-the-way</b></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><b><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">inoculation site for </span></b></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><b><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">a vast </span></b></span></o:p><b><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">hospital system</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Inoculation<i> sites</i>? <i>The plural?</i> Hah! There’s only one site. They’ve stuck in in an armory in the distant reaches of Upper Manhattan, an inconvenience to anyone who doesn’t live in the neighborhood, or along a couple of West Side subway lines. I live near Midtown on the East Side of Manhattan. I’d need to take a cross town bus, and then a long, long subway ride, and then a bit of a hike to get to the armory.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">But okay. I need that shot. I’m in a double high-risk category. In the first place I’m over 65 — <i>way over 65</i>. I’m 81 years old. And second, I’m immuno-compromised. I’m suffering from chronic lymphatic leukemia. So you’d think it would be easy.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Sorry. You can’t get an appointment at the armory. None available. Period. Never mind that it could be a two hour trip on public transportation (most New Yorkers don’t own cars) to get to the one out-of-the-way site the hospital is offering. There’s no way to get the shot without an appointment, and after three days of trying, I’ve concluded there’s no way to get an appointment.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">How about at the city’s Bellevue Hospital, which is only a few blocks from where I live? Same bad news. No appointments available. And ditto a couple of other sites I’ve tried.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Fill out some forms.</b></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Then fill out some forms. And <i>then</i></b></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>fill out some forms.</b></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Incidentally, each time I go to a site I have to fill out a questionnaire before I can ask for an appointment. My name. My date of birth. My address. Certain questions about my medical history. Questions about my ethnicity. (No, I don’t know why they need to know my ethnicity before they can give me a shot either.) Then, the site tells me there are no appointments. It does so either by saying so, or by leaving me staring at an image of a beating heart for an hour until I give up, or by crashing.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: large;"><iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dy4UBeAJeDtBnAbIWyJjGG28kgoiZFFmIqduLkB_Py-fAj_WWUWlvj1VkqebojsAVanlNp5CxFqIik' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe></span></div><span style="font-size: large;">How long can you watch this stupid beating heart before you realize you're never getting a response?</span><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Want to try another site? You go through the same infuriating rigamarole again. You want to go back to Columbia-Presbyterian to try again? Or to make a second, third, or seventeenth try at any other site? You have to fill out the forms all over again.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">So a few questions: <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">Why do the hospitals of Columbia-Presbyterian, that were permitted to merge into a vast, conglomerated hospital system, feel that a single, out-of-the-way armory in the outer reaches of upper Manhattan is sufficient for administering shots that could be a matter of life and death for many of its patients around the city? <o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Have they grown so big that they’ve become too unwieldy to function with any efficiency in a pandemic?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">What’s that, Columbia-Presbyterian? You feel you don’t have the space elsewhere? How about that vast lobby in the multi-gazillion dollar skyscraper building at 1305 York Avenue, donated by one of New York’s least-loved billionaires, David H. Koch? What’s that? Koch’s humongous lobby can’t be sullied by the hoi-polloi standing around in line for their shots? <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Okay, I understand. So how about emptying out one of the huge underground parking garages you have in your Weill-Cornell Medical Center? Oh, I know it’ll inconvenience the doctors. But what you’re saying by <i>not</i> making some of that garage space available is that it’s more important to make sure the doctors can drive to work instead of taking public transportation than it is to save lives.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><b>A callback system? Hah!</b></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And why, New York Presbyterian, can’t a poor desperate patient leave his or her name and contact information with you and have you get back to them with an appointment, in the order the request was made? Especially when the alternative is to spend futile hours, day after day, trying to somehow, somewhere, land an appointment for a COVID-19 shot.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Ditto you, Bellevue Hospital. And you, New York City Department of Health on Worth Street in Lower Manhattan, where it’s also impossible to get an appointment as of this writing. And you, the Ryan Center on 10<sup>th</sup> Avenue in Midtown Manhattan. And on and on.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Cuomo and DeBlasio—</b></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><o:p style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">take a bow for </span></o:p><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">incompetence</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">The fault for this ongoing SNAFU needs to be shared by New York’s Govenor Cuomo, and the city’s Mayor DeBlasio, and the administrators of all the public and private not-for-profit hospitals in the city. There appears to be no strategic planning. No attempt to take appointments more two or three weeks in advance. No attempt to make a record of who attempts to apply and then get back to them. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span>In short Cuomo, and DeBlasio, and the hospitals are as incompetent and as screwed up as the Trump Administration’s famously failed vaccine team and the Trump PPE team. Maybe Jared Kushner has a future as a New York hospital administrator. Or on Governor Cuomo's staff. </span><span>It seems to me he’d fit right in.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Sadly, the consequence of this incompetence is going to be vulnerable people who not only can’t get a shot, but who may contract COVID and die of it before they can even get an appointment for an innoculation.</span><o:p></o:p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-56814125565167961612021-01-12T17:18:00.004-05:002021-01-12T17:34:54.651-05:00A partial guide to peripheral stupidity in the waning times of Trump<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-U7aOAxi__Qs/X_4Z8_0nWuI/AAAAAAAAEGg/1y22yrgHfbYX0abhLoJGWOxKcq8KqHjWgCNcBGAsYHQ/s408/IMG_0736.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="408" data-original-width="359" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-U7aOAxi__Qs/X_4Z8_0nWuI/AAAAAAAAEGg/1y22yrgHfbYX0abhLoJGWOxKcq8KqHjWgCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/IMG_0736.jpeg" /></a></div><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"> Use any of these words to colorfully describe our </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"> villainous Imbecile in Chief<o:p></o:p></p><p><span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">As I write this, there are only eight days remaining before Donald Trump is officially out of the White House (presumably) and the place can get quickly fumigated and sterilized before Joe and Jill Biden sleep there.</span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">If I were the Bidens, I would also get rid of the mattress in the Presidential bedroom. I’ve heard rumors that Trump can be a bed wetter even when he’s wide awake. Or maybe especially when he’s wide awake.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Pre-inaguration, the TV and cable news channels, and the newspapers, and the Internet are all but exploding with Trump-related controversies. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">To impeach or not to impeach, that is the question. Unless the question is whether Mike Pence and what’s left of Trump’s corrupt cabinet sufficiently stiffen their spines to declare him incompetent and remove him from office. Unless it’s about intercepts of the Crazy Right’s plans to not only disrupt Washington on Inauguration Day, but also to invade the capitol buildings of all 50 states. (Given how poorly their takeover of Congress did, how do they expect a nationwide, multi-front invasion to work out?) Unless it’s…<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">O bother! Insanity doesn’t have to be political. It can also be fun. Which is why I now offer for your delectation a taste of the kinds of miscellaneous stupidities that will likely confront you a bit more prominently in the news once Trump is out of our faces….<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>A tempest in a Rebok.</b> Well, actually, it’s a <i>pair</i> of Reboks. Unless they’re Keds. Yes, they look suspiciously like the canvas Keds I wore when I was a kid. And that was a long, long time ago. So long ago that Harry S. Truman was President.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">See, the sneakers in question were on Vice-President Elect Kamala Harris’s feet, and she was <a href="https://www.nbcnews.com/news/nbcblk/critics-kamala-harris-vogue-cover-say-legendary-glossy-failed-give-n1253759">posing for a photograph</a>, and the photograph got used on the cover of Vogue. The resulting fallout might have come from a nuclear explosion. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">How <i>dare</i> they use a photograph like that, critics fumed. It was precisely the kind of fuming that gushed from the Republican outrage machine when Barak Obama had the temerity — the <i>temerity</i> mind you! — to be seen wearing a a <a href="https://thehill.com/blogs/in-the-know/in-the-know/459155-barack-obamas-tan-suit-controversy-hits-5-year-anniversary">tan suit</a> while President. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">I’d blame the huff over Harris on the Covid-19 plague, which has caused some people to be locked up inside four walls for way too long, with far too little to do. I <i>would</i> blame the plague, that is, were it not for the Great Tan Suit Kerfluffle of 2014. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Are you as convinced as I am that some people wake up each morning and the first thing they reach for is their electrical Outrage Stimulator, which should be use to gently massage the…okay, enough I’m going to stop going there before I get into trouble. Instead, let’s go to Paris for the latest <i>contretemps</i> over…<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span><b>Bug Brother!</b> </span><span>That’s what the Parisian press is calling it. Turns out that, according to the respectable French journal </span><span><a href=" https://www.lemonde.fr/blog/bugbrother/2014/12/12/une-station-espion-de-la-nsa-en-plein-paris/">Le Monde</a>,</span><span> everybody’s bugging Paris with high tech equipment installed on Parisian rooftops. Les Americans?</span><span> </span><span><i>Mais bien sûr</i> </span><span>we’re doing it. And right from our embassy roof. But rival journal </span><a href="https://www.lefigaro.fr/international/2013/07/02/01003-20130702ARTFIG00324-espionnage-des-toits-des-ambassades-aux-chambres-des-hotels-de-luxe.php"><span>Le Figaro</span></a><span> seems to be implying, everybody else is doing it, too — sometimes even from deluxe hotel rooms. A perfect case of whataboutism gone wild.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">So what’s a poor Parisian to do when everybody’s guilty?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>One guy in Paris began hammering a subway wall with his head. </b>I mean, I know this falls into the category of “You can’t make this stuff up,” but that’s precisely why I’m telling you about it here. Sometimes authentic crazy is absolutely the best crazy.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Seems this all started during a contretemps over <i>la liberté</i>, and more specifically, over what the head-banger perceived as his freedom not to wear a mask on the Paris metro, despite local regs that in effect say, no mask, no entry and no ride. Remember, this guy isn’t some American MAGA. He's a genuine <a href="https://www.lefigaro.fr/faits-divers/a-paris-un-homme-se-tape-la-tete-contre-un-mur-pour-accuser-la-police-de-violences-20210106">French </a><i><a href="https://www.lefigaro.fr/faits-divers/a-paris-un-homme-se-tape-la-tete-contre-un-mur-pour-accuser-la-police-de-violences-20210106">fou-fou</a>.</i><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">It happened at the St. Lazare subway station. When the cops approached this guy to enforce the rules, he not only began hammering the wall with his head, but also shouted out some insults and threats so clear and specific that you don’t need a handbook of obscure French slang to translate them. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Specifically, he calls the cops “dirty bastards” and a “bunch of fascists.” He also threatened, “I’m going to cut your throats. You and your children.” And according to the Parisian cops, the head banging was a deliberate attempt to injure himself so that he could accuse the cops of violence.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">He was sentenced to six months in prison. Think you’ll miss him? Don’t worry. There’s a new self-defeating nincompoop born every minute.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>How to lose a fortune as a high tech idiot.</b> It’s simple. Believe in and buy Bitcoin, the new craze for the kind of fools who used to buy and hide gold so that, come The Ultimate Catastrophe when their bucks and bank accounts would be useless, they’d be able to shop for…who knows? And furthermore, the tax man can't find out that they have the a gazillion bucks worth of bitcoin.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Bitcoin isn’t entirely stupid. The technology behind it makes possession and trade in the stuff hard to hack. Which is precisely the problem. Or at least one of the problems. (The other is that because Bitcoin can fluctuate substantially, you never can be sure whether tomorrow your bitcoins will make you a millionaire, a billionaire, or a pathetic loser.)<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Anyway, it seems that one numnuts received 7002 Bitcoins for making an animated video. That’s not chickenfeed. As I write this, one Bitcoin sells for 33,868 dollars and 30 cents. Which makes the jerk in question worth, at least on paper, over $237,000,000. By the time you read this, it might be wya more. Or way less.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Problem is, about ten years ago the guy <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2021/01/12/technology/bitcoin-passwords-wallets-fortunes.html?action=click&module=Editors%20Picks&pgtype=Homepage">lost his “key,”</a> — which functions essentially like a very difficult password. Now he can’t touch his money. And there’s no Bitcoin Central that he can dial up, or key up on the Internet and say, “Hey I forgot my password. If I answer two secret questions about my grandmother’s favorite sex toy and my pet’s maiden name, will you e-mail me a new one?”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Instead, you get ten opportunities to try to guess your password. If you don’t get it by the tenth try, you are screwed for life. I don’t know who gets your Bitcoin, but you don’t, and you can never get it again. The poor guy has tried eight times. Should he try again? Or leave it alone so that on paper he’s 237 times a millionaire even if he can’t afford a Coke? <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">See, if Trump were gone, we could all spend our time gossiping about stupid stuff like this. Wouldn’t it be heaven?</span><o:p></o:p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-39751331427616462542021-01-07T23:20:00.004-05:002021-01-11T18:51:20.613-05:00It’s time to move Donald Trump from the White House to some other house. But what about some of his enablers? Is it also time to disbar Giuliani?<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-R_m-0WHCols/X_faowL3y2I/AAAAAAAAEGQ/DRKOTgdnfiEzBexWWyKcj2uo_XC6ge72ACNcBGAsYHQ/s2048/IMG_0269.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="400" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-R_m-0WHCols/X_faowL3y2I/AAAAAAAAEGQ/DRKOTgdnfiEzBexWWyKcj2uo_XC6ge72ACNcBGAsYHQ/w300-h400/IMG_0269.jpeg" width="300" /></a></div><span> <span> <span> Move Trump and his enablers from the White House to the....</span></span></span><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Rudolph Giuliani, Donald Trump Jr., Lara Trump and Eric Trump were among the rabble rousers who joined Donald Trump in inciting the treasonous insurrection that on Wednesday made headlines around the world. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">A mob invaded the Capitol, smashed windows, broke down doors, and trashed office, threatening legislators while interrupting the business of Congress.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">“We’re coming for you,” Trump Junior <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2021/01/06/us/politics/trump-speech-capitol.html">said,</a> reportedly referring to Republican members of Congress who don’t back pro-Trump efforts. Later, Junior told his supporters to call off the violence. That’s a bit like a mad bomber changing his mind several seconds after he’s lighted the fuse.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">They all deserve to face a jury. But meanwhile, the New York Bar Association may be able to do something very quickly about Giuliani.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">It was Giuliani who, prior to the mob’s terrorist attack on Congress, called for “trial by combat.” What could that possibly have been, if not a call to violence and sedition?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Disbar him.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">It doesn’t take an act of Congress. It doesn’t take a presidential order. It doesn’t take any government action. All it takes is the members of the New York Bar Association.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Lawyers of New York? Where do you stand?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p><br /> <span style="font-size: large;"><b>UPDATE (January 11)— </b>Turns out there's more to disbarring Giuliani than I thought, but somebody at the New York Bar Association either reads this blog or <a href="https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/donald-trump/new-york-state-bar-association-moves-remove-rudy-giuliani-its-n1253722?fbclid=IwAR0T4wZcuV7ksv8V4ppqgqqlUlqh-iEWyqY79yShiNz9KvQ-DqqbCVT1VPA">arrived at the same conclusion</a> anyway.</span></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-8656213412202721392021-01-02T18:21:00.005-05:002021-01-02T18:37:24.214-05:0014 newspaper headlines I’d like to see in 2021 but most probably won’t<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><tbody><tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LUNEqkfp9Do/X_D72j1x3EI/AAAAAAAAEF0/xL5iKK1kAtAJf5VY7sO7QUChOFgHWzDUQCNcBGAsYHQ/s236/Trump%2BDoubleChin.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="236" data-original-width="236" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-LUNEqkfp9Do/X_D72j1x3EI/AAAAAAAAEF0/xL5iKK1kAtAJf5VY7sO7QUChOFgHWzDUQCNcBGAsYHQ/s0/Trump%2BDoubleChin.jpg" /></a></td></tr><tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Guaranteed authentic charicature</td></tr></tbody></table><br /><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Trump Forcefully Escorted </span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">From White House in Strait Jacket<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Vengeful Elephant Herd<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Tramples Don and Eric<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">During African Safari<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Lindsay Graham Resigns Senate Seat<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">To Join Remote Tibetan Monastery</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">Meanwhile Mitch McConnell s</span></b><b><span style="font-size: large;">ends for monastery brochure</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Trump Rests Peacefully <o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">In Hospital After</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Eighteen Massive </span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Thorazine Injections <o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Doctors Remove <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rpDqHz13YjA" target="_blank">Kimberly Guilfoyle’s<o:p></o:p></a></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rpDqHz13YjA" target="_blank">Vocal Chords</a> In Emergency Surgery<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">“Covfefe” Was Code Signal To<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Trump’s Russian Handlers<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Classified CIA Report Reveals<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Self-Pardon Tossed by Court<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">After Trump Misspells “Pardon”<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: medium;">“The U.S. Constitution says nothing a</span></b><b><span style="font-size: medium;">bout “paradonnes,” Judge declares</span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">1,000 Vials of Spoiled Vaccine Discovered <o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">In Trump’s Fridge, Next to Expired Hamburgers</span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Ivanka Reveals She Leaked<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">White House Secrets to The Press<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><i><b><span style="font-size: large;">"I didn’t think they’d print it," she says</span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><i><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Assay of Trump Tower Gold Toilet <o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Reveals It’s Actually Iron Pyrites<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">Former Wharton Classmate Reveals He Got<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">Paid to Take Final Exams for Donald Trump</span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><i><b>"I feel lucky I wasn't stiffed," he says.</b></i></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">National Arts Commission Declares Border Wall <o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">An “Eyesore” And Orders It Torn Down</span><span style="font-size: x-large;"><o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Javanka Splitsville?<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Friends Refuse to Say Until They<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Get Their Covid Vaccinations<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Melania: “As Best I Can Remember<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: x-large;">Donald Was Terrible in Bed”<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><i><b><span style="font-size: x-large;"><br /></span></b></i></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><i><br /></i></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-59096973495885730212020-12-28T16:26:00.001-05:002020-12-28T16:26:28.258-05:00So long 2020, it's been lousy to know ya. And good riddance!<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-N2jrsEP5yZk/X-pMOB6TZwI/AAAAAAAAEFk/VUTwgBdkJCQHvTDCT3ewj2WTpCglqd9vgCNcBGAsYHQ/s1105/2020.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1091" data-original-width="1105" height="395" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-N2jrsEP5yZk/X-pMOB6TZwI/AAAAAAAAEFk/VUTwgBdkJCQHvTDCT3ewj2WTpCglqd9vgCNcBGAsYHQ/w400-h395/2020.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-size: large;"> And please, 2020, take Donald Trump and his entire administration with you on your way down</span>.<p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-8523297085431436272020-12-22T01:16:00.000-05:002020-12-22T01:16:50.653-05:00A Christmas carol for the time of Trump and plague<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-9hWJ5VH5qIk/X-GH1_a2LXI/AAAAAAAAEFU/hiAaC0Nj7xc-b_PO7I4HrayYruKD1B8dQCNcBGAsYHQ/s400/Carol.Jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="328" data-original-width="400" height="328" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-9hWJ5VH5qIk/X-GH1_a2LXI/AAAAAAAAEFU/hiAaC0Nj7xc-b_PO7I4HrayYruKD1B8dQCNcBGAsYHQ/w400-h328/Carol.Jpg" width="400" /></a></div>Unfortunately, there aren't nearly enough days of Christmas to cover the phenomenon that is Trump. But I've squeezed in all I could.<br /> <p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">On the first day of Christmas<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Donald gave to me<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">A phony Trump College degree.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">On the second day of Christmas<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Donald gave to me<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Two failed casinos <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">And a phony Trump College degree.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">On the third day of Christmas<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Donald gave to me<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Three pandemics spreading<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Two failed casinos<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">And a phony Trump College degree.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">On the fourth day of Christmas<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Donald gave to me<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Four dissembling lawyers<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Three pandemics spreading<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Two failed casinos <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">And a phony Trump College degree.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">On the fifth day of Christmas<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Donald gave to me<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Me-lan-i-a<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Lawyers with forked tongues<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Pandemics<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Two casinos failed<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">And a phony Trump College degree.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">On the sixth day of Christmas<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Donald gave to me<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Six walls a-building<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Me-lan-i-a<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Lawyers with forked tongues<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Pandemics<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Two casinos failed<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">And a phony Trump College degree.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">On the seventh day of Christmas<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Donald gave to me<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Seven speeches lying<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Six walls a-building<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Me-lan-i-a<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Lawyers with forked tongues<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Pandemics<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Two casinos failed<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">And a phony Trump College degree.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">On the eighth day of Christmas<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Donald gave to me<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Eight caged children crying<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Seven speeches lying<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Six walls a-building<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Me-lan-i-a<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Lawyers with forked tongues<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Pandemics<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Two casinos failed<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">And a phony Trump College degree.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">On the ninth day of Christmas<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Donald gave to me<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Nine Ivankas vamping<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Eight caged children crying<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Seven speeches lying<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Six walls a-building<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Me-lan-i-a<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Lawyers with forked tongues<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Pandemics<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Two casinos bust<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">And a phony Trump College degree.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">On the tenth day of Christmas<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Donald gave to me<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Ten Kushners complaining<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Nine Ivankas vamping<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Eight caged children crying<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Seven speeches lying<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Six walls a-building<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Me-lan-i-a<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Lawyers with forked tongues<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Pandemics<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Two casinos bust<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">And a phony Trump College degree.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">On the eleventh day of Christmas<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Donald gave to me<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Eleven Rudys ranting <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Ten Kushners complaining<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Nine Ivankas vamping<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Eight caged children crying<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Seven speeches lying<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Six walls a-building<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Me-lan-i-a<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Lawyers with forked tongues<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Pandemics<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Two casinos bust<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">And a phony Trump College degree.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: x-large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">On the twelveth day of Christmas<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">The Donald gave to me<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Twelve pardons absolving<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Eleven Rudys ranting <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Ten Kushners complaining<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Nine Ivankas vamping<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Eight caged children crying<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Seven speeches lying<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Six walls a-building<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Me-lan-i-a<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Lawyers with forked tongues<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Pandemics<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Two casinos bust</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">And a phony Trump College degree</span></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-23475320802524491572020-12-18T23:15:00.013-05:002020-12-19T02:09:25.134-05:00The Execution of the Week. Is it coming soon to a TV station near you?<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-dgt4s81kzNw/X913LQDo8HI/AAAAAAAAEFE/GEcCkkyMx1Eonky5Uxy0i3WH4PA1fetMwCNcBGAsYHQ/s423/970.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="423" data-original-width="300" height="640" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-dgt4s81kzNw/X913LQDo8HI/AAAAAAAAEFE/GEcCkkyMx1Eonky5Uxy0i3WH4PA1fetMwCNcBGAsYHQ/w456-h640/970.jpg" width="456" /></a></div><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"> Donald Trump first publicly advertised his sociopathic blood lust</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"> with this full page ad in 1989<o:p></o:p></p><p><span style="font-size: large;"> <span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">Over at the <a href=" http://yastreblyansky.blogspot.com/2020/12/red-pills-make-you-larger-and-blue.html">Rectification of Names</a>, the blogger</span><i style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"> </i><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">Yastreblyansky suggests that Donald Trump’s next act may be another television reality show.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">But instead of being “Apprentice”-like, this show will be “effectively the ongoing Trump presidency as he makes incredible deals for the American people, drains the swamp, and makes America great again.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">How will he do that? <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">“…the apprentice will be working for a government rather than a corporation, on a different project each season; for example creating healthcare for the American people that is much better and cheaper than Obamacare, eating China’s lunch, or building a wall and making Mexico pay for it.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><b>But where is Trump</b></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>really</i> going?</b></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">I won’t spoil the rest for you. It’s a hoot! Get yourself over to Yastreblyansky when you’re done here and read the piece in its hilarious entirety. However, I don’t think that’s where Trump is really going. And no, I’m not saying he doesn’t want a reality show. I’m saying that his mind has taken a turn too dark and too ominous for light entertainment about launching a government program.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Trump’s blood lust was merely incipient when he took out a full page ad in the New York Times years ago to advocate the execution of <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2016/feb/17/central-park-five-donald-trump-jogger-rape-case-new-york">five teen-agers</a> who turned out to be innocent of assault and rape. Besides, New York State was no longer executing anybody for anything by then. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">But his urge to kill human beings has now bloomed into a tangible thing. After 17 years with no Federal executions, and despite the fact that support for capital punishment is dribbling away, the U.S. government has carried out more executions <a href="https://www.cbsnews.com/news/federal-government-has-executed-more-inmates-this-year-than-states-first-time/">in one year</a> that all the state governments combined. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Nor is that enough for Donald Trump. He and his outgoing Attorney General, Bill Barr, have arranged for five more human beings to get snuffed before Inauguration Day, including the only woman on death row. She will be the first woman to be executed by the Federal Government<a href="https://time.com/5914533/lisa-montgomery-execution-coronavirus-death-penalty/"> in 70 years</a>.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">President-Elect Biden has vowed that there will be no Federal executions on his watch — so what’s a poor bloodthirsty sociopath like Donald Trump to do? Here’s what I think. I think he’s going to launch a TV series called “The Execution of the Week.” <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"><b>Beheadings, </b></span><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b>stonings, </b></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><b>and so bloody much more!</b></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Each week Donald Trump will go to a different country and witness a different execution by a different and more barbarous method. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">One week it’ll be a public beheading ordered by Jared Kushner's pal in Saudi Arabia, Prince Mohammed bin Salman. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Another week, a trembling political dissident in China gets shot in the back of the head with a bullet that his family was forced to pay for. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Yet another week, Trump will go to Moscow where we’ll witness the FSB kill a journalist by squirting novichok in her eyes. And so on. Did I mention stoning an adulteress and a homosexual to death in Brunei? We could have <i>two</i> brutal executions in one night!<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">The shows will be an hour long. During each, we’ll hear from an advocate for the accused, from proponents of the death penalty, as well as interpretations of the law in the nation Trump is visiting. Legal commentary will come from some of the last remaining Fox News commentators who Trump still likes, like Judge Jeanine Pirro. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Outside “experts” will also get called in to comment on the guilt of the condemned person or the incontrovertible appropriateness of the sentence — learned deep thinkers like Rudy Giuliani and Tucker Carlson. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Kiss my hard and </b></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><b>glistening ring</b></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Finally, the accused themselves will be given an opportunity to plead their own cases, and grovel on their hands and knees before Trump, begging for their lives. Trump will be wearing a special gold ring, which the condemned prisoners will be required to kiss. But Trump’s answer will always be the same: <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">“Forget it," he'll sneer, "you’re <i>executed!</i>” <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">At that point, America’s formerly MAGA audiences will get to watch an actual life getting snuffed out, while Trump stands and applauds approvingly. When it's over he'll grab Melania's hand as the two board his own private aircraft. They'l fly to a palatial house called Far é Gargle at an undisclosed location in an undisclosed state.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">No doubt Trump expects that the ratings will go through the roof. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Given this nation’s recent pathological history, he’s probably right.</span><o:p></o:p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-40673481228441767032020-12-14T19:22:00.007-05:002020-12-14T22:43:50.945-05:00Merde in France! Les restaurants! Les bars! Un désastre énorme!<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-uJzJjUHOF5k/X9f2er6dclI/AAAAAAAAEE4/DpH3KfD479MwXKWHCp7bTRHox7JzbyYUQCNcBGAsYHQ/s1543/journee-portes-ouvertes-chateau-meridon-78-vallee-chevreuse.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="978" data-original-width="1543" height="255" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-uJzJjUHOF5k/X9f2er6dclI/AAAAAAAAEE4/DpH3KfD479MwXKWHCp7bTRHox7JzbyYUQCNcBGAsYHQ/w400-h255/journee-portes-ouvertes-chateau-meridon-78-vallee-chevreuse.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">This is where I was tutored on the fundamental importance of French bistros. (I lived in the tower on the left-hand side.)</span><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">So listen up, plague victims. Here in New York, vaccine or no vaccine, infection and death rates are so high that the mayor has finally bitten the bullet, swallowed the bitter pill, and closed restaurants to all but outdoor dining. (Lotsa luck on that, with temperatures often hovering close to freezing, particularly when it’s raining, snowing, or the wind is blowing.)<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">The cries of pain among New York’s restaurateurs and barkeeps are legion. But the problem isn’t just local. Or even just American. In France, the great, <i>les formidables,</i> and the merely modest-but-superb neighborhood restaurants are also feeling the pain of COVID-19. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Restaurants and cafés there have been ordered closed until January 20<sup>th</sup>, and then only if the pandemic subsides sufficiently, in the judgment of the authorities, to allow reopenings. Meanwhile, bars and nightclubs in France have been shuttered since October 30<sup>th</sup>, reports the publication <a href="https://www.connexionfrance.com/French-news/Restaurants-in-France-waiting-for-January-reopening-from-Covid-confinement">Connexion France</a>.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">The United States, with slightly more than five times the population of France, has roughly <a href="https://www.google.com/search?client=safari&source=hp&ei=n9TXX-7EJfCp5wLAl5nwDQ&q=current+number+of+covid+fatalities+in+france&oq=current+number+of+covid+fatalities+in+france&gs_lcp=CgZwc3ktYWIQAzIICCEQFhAdEB4yCAghEBYQHRAeMggIIRAWEB0QHjoFCAAQsQM6CAgAELEDEIMBOg4ILhCxAxCDARDHARCjAjoLCC4QsQMQxwEQowI6CAguELEDEIMBOgsILhCxAxCDARCTAjoCCAA6BQguELEDOggIABCxAxDJAzoLCAAQsQMQgwEQyQM6BwgAEMkDEA06BAgAEA06BQgAEMkDOgYIABAWEB46BQghEKABOgQIIRAKOgkIABDJAxAWEB5Quw9Y6XtgxXxoBXAAeAGAAZ0CiAHAKJIBBzIyLjI1LjGYAQCgAQGqAQdnd3Mtd2l6&sclient=psy-ab&ved=0ahUKEwiukIKBsc7tAhXw1FkKHcBLBt4Q4dUDCAw&uact=5">eight times</a> as many COVID-19 cases — but the government of France seems a bit more determined than a certain crowd at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue to tamp down its nation’s infection rate even before everybody can get inoculated.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">Glock? What Glock? I have<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">my 50-caliber Hyperbole<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">When Americans are told to mask up and stop eating out, they tend to reach for semi-automatic weapons and plot to <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2020/10/09/us/michigan-militia-whitmer.html">kidnap the governor</a> of their state. In France, they instead lunge for their hyperbole.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Once the piddling trickle of government loans to stressed restaurants has stopped, said an executive of a food service research company, “a massacre will happen very suddenly.” Presumably he was thinking about a massacre of the restaurant business, not of government officials. But even so.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">Meanwhile, French representatives of the <i>sous chefs</i> in hotel kitchens also had some wild hyperbole simmering on the front burner. </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">"We hope to make this crazy government understand that the sector is on the verge of collapse, and that we are closer to having one foot in the grave than being able to reopen," <a href="https://www.connexionfrance.com/French-news/Restaurant-and-hotel-workers-to-protest-Covid-19-closure-in-Paris-today?utm_source=Master+List&utm_campaign=4dc8d3da30-NewsletterOct72020_COPY_01&utm_medium=email&utm_term=0_9b5fbe85b4-4dc8d3da30-358521929">said a vice-president</a> of a French hotel union.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Perhaps it's worth noting here that restaurants, cafés and bars have a place in French culture that lacks a real equivalent in the United States.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">Dumpy apartments and <o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">magnificent bistros<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">If you’ve been to France and noticed all the cafés, restaurants, and bars that all but clutter the grand boulevards and narrow back streets of French cities, there’s a reason for it. And that reason goes back to — I’ll tell you how I know this stuff a bit further on — that reason goes back to French income taxes. Specifically, income taxes in the 19<sup>th</sup> and early 20<sup>th</sup>Centuries.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">See, France, like all advanced nations, needed an income tax to thrive. But French manners — </span><i style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">la politesse</i><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"> — made it a big no-no to ask people what they earned. Or for their employers to snitch on them. So instead, more than a century ago, the French equivalent of the IRS would send an inspector to your home to look around. He’d finger the damask drapes, sink his shoes into the plush carpeting, ogle the Dégas painting on your living room wall and think “These people are clearly loaded.” And then you'd get socked with a tax bill that might you wish you had <i>both</i> feet in the grave. <o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">Disgust the inspector<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">To counter taxes and trick the inspectors, French citizens began turning their homes into dumps. The stuffing isn’t coming out of the couch? Quick, adopt a cat! The paint is peeling off the walls?</span><i style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">Merveilleux!</i><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;"> One has accidently spilled a pleasantly insoucient glass of Margaux on<i> la carpette</i>? Don’t try to blot it up. Leave the stain there to disgust the inspector.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Unsurprisingly, personal living quarters during that era became so yucky that the French didn’t much like entertaining at home. They tended to invite friends to dinner, or just for drinks, out of the house. And before you could say <i>Ooh la la</i>, restaurants and cafés were ubiquitous in France.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif;">The tax laws have since changed and some French folks do entertain at home — usually a very nice home — these days. But the restaurants, the cafés, and the bars are all still there, although they're closed for the moment. Or for more than a moment if they get snuffed by the fallout from COVID-19<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">From fox hunts, to culture courses,<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">to very chi chi weddings<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">I learned all this stuff about eating in restaurants and its place in the lives of French citizens as a young college student, attending a way-off-campus seminar on French culture at a then-decrepit castle about 30 miles south of Paris. It was, and still is called Chateau Meridon. The educators who once ran the place, which was originally built as a French baron’s country hunting castle, have long since departed. These days, new owners have<a href="http://www.chateaudemeridon.fr"> spiffed the joint up</a>, and made it a venue primarily for elegant weddings, offsite business conferences — and who knows, maybe even a stray bar mitzvah. Although these days, Covid-19 may be inflicting pain on the chateau, too.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">But I hope you'll remember that until recently, and with any luck soon again, one of the best reasons to go to France is to go to restaurants, from the Five Star Michelin gastronomic palaces, to the little neighborhood bistros.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Is there a moral to this story? Yeah, sort of. Chuck the diet. Eat while you can, for tomorrow you — or perhaps your favorite restaurant — may be dead.</span><o:p></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p> </o:p></p><p><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p></o:p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-7197833239508296912020-12-11T16:23:00.001-05:002020-12-11T16:23:19.098-05:00Nuclear bombs, dead bodies, capital punishment, and Donald Trump<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vgWlBb6W8-M/X9Pc_HUFiZI/AAAAAAAAEEs/hrPu6nVW91YxLgdiV4b5tjJ-xigSVl5NwCNcBGAsYHQ/s600/Nagasakibomb.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="600" data-original-width="502" height="400" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vgWlBb6W8-M/X9Pc_HUFiZI/AAAAAAAAEEs/hrPu6nVW91YxLgdiV4b5tjJ-xigSVl5NwCNcBGAsYHQ/w335-h400/Nagasakibomb.jpg" width="335" /></a></div><br /> The Nagasaki blast. It killed fewer people than all the Americans who have died of COVID-19 to date. (Photo, Wikimedia Commons.)<p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">As of December 11<sup>th</sup>, the date I’m posting this, America has lost 293,000 of its citizens to COVID-19. Commentators have taken to comparing the huge number of COVID-19 deaths to the loss of American soldiers in WWII. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">I prefer another comparison.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">A nuclear bomb. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">In fact, <i>two</i> nuclear bombs.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">The A-bombs that the U.S. used to flatten Hiroshima and Nagasaki in 1945, according to estimates that are sometimes described as <a href="http://www.aasc.ucla.edu/cab/200708230009.html">“over conservative,”</a> killed or wounded a combined 225,000 people. That’s 68,000 fewer than the 293,000 Americans dead of COVID-19.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">An atomic blast aimed at taking out a city of 293,000 or fewer persons could completely wipe out, the entire population and then some of, <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_United_States_cities_by_population">municipalities</a> like: Savannah, Georgia; Paterson, New Jersey; Sunnyvale, California; Jackson, Mississippi; Springfield Missouri; Salem, Oregon; Providence, Rhode Island; Fort Lauderdale, Florida; Chattanooga, Tennessee; Sioux Falls, South Dakota; Vancouver, Washington; Tallahassee, Florida; Little Rock, Arkansas; Montgomery, Alabama; Salt Lake City, Utah; Birmingham, Alabama; Des Moines, Iowa; Baton Rouge, Louisiana; Buffalo, New York; Lincoln, Nebraska; and…but why go on? <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>America, we’ve been nuked</b><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">There are 251 significant American cities have smaller populations than the American population lost to COVID-19 thus far. America, we’ve been nuked. Yes, nuked by a virus, not an atom bomb. But the end result is the same — dead American bodies, unimaginable human suffering, and a line of coffins stretching into the distant horizon, and growing longer every day.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And who, through his policy of neglect, denial, and downright lies, not to mention inattention when there was a golf game to be joined, is responsible for likely half those deaths? Yes, Donald Trump.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">He has, whether through benign neglect or, more likely cold indifference, killed off enough Americans to fill a good-sized city, with more deaths coming every day, more than 3,000 a day at latest count. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Is there no accountability for this? <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">Trump also likes to poison,<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">shoot, and electrocute prisoners<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Remember, we are talking about a president who has no qualms about putting people to death. His Justice Department this week executed a man named Brandon Bernard for murder who was just 18 years old at the time the crime was committed. The case had been appealed up to the Supreme Court. The New York Times <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2020/12/10/us/brandon-bernard-execution-death-penalty.html?action=click&module=Latest&pgtype=Homepage">reports</a>:</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;"></span></span></p><blockquote><span style="font-size: large;">In her dissent, Justice Sonia Sotomayor argued that if the prosecution had not withheld the evidence and knowingly elicited false testimony as Mr. Bernard claimed, there is reasonable probability that he would not have been sentenced to death. She also contended that an appeals court that denied Mr. Bernard’s motion in a case related to the testimony “got it wrong,” and required too strict a standard that “perversely rewards the government for keeping exculpatory information secret.” </span></blockquote><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Speaking of perversity, in Donald Trump’s haste to execute as many prisoners as possible before he leaves office, Bernard was one of six federal prisoners scheduled to be executed between election day and Trump's last day as President. And Trump, evidently in the thrall of his own depraved personality, has urged that instead of lethal injection, his condemned victims ought to be <a href="https://baptistnews.com/article/trump-wants-to-bring-back-firing-squads-trump-supporters-want-to-execute-opponents-while-support-for-death-penalty-continues-to-decline/#.X9O3Di2cZuU">electrocuted or face a firing squad</a>. In the face of declining support for the death penalty, even some parts of the religious Christian community that usually backs him seem shocked. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>A twisted inner lust?</b></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">It’s hard to imagine why Donald Trump wants this, other than to satisfy some twisted inner lust for cruelty. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">But if the murder of two people, or murder committed by a mentally-ill woman are worthy of the death penalty by electrocution, a hail of bullets, or even an injection of poison in the view and practice of the Trump Administration, what kind of punishment is Donald Trump worthy of for an atomic bomb’s worth of dead Americans?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And will he ever be held to account? </span><o:p></o:p></p><p><br /></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-28758243869799061952020-12-06T01:32:00.000-05:002020-12-06T01:32:36.463-05:00Art imitates art imitating Hitler, who imitates Donald Trump, who isn't even born yet. Or something.<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/2DzlWYv2lFY" width="320" youtube-src-id="2DzlWYv2lFY"></iframe></div><br /><p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-69886803976762188022020-12-03T16:20:00.006-05:002020-12-03T17:19:31.024-05:00What will Donald Trump wear when he finally moves out of the White House? Plus: Straying monoliths and Lisa Desjardins' vanishing cat.<p> </p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Fp_MCh83Y08/X8lMPgL3NzI/AAAAAAAAEDw/Qg1whPMqigk1WFJcbaTvIppKEozlJVL1QCNcBGAsYHQ/s233/images-1.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="233" data-original-width="216" height="400" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Fp_MCh83Y08/X8lMPgL3NzI/AAAAAAAAEDw/Qg1whPMqigk1WFJcbaTvIppKEozlJVL1QCNcBGAsYHQ/w371-h400/images-1.jpeg" width="371" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">Just a suggestion</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;">It ought to be evident to just about everybody by now that our beloved President will not go cheerfully, if at all. He may get out of the White House by January 20th, but not with a smile on his face. And who knows whether he will find some excuse to refuse to get out?</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;">What if he has to be ejected by force? Some folks relish the thought of his being escorted out in handcuffs. Or just walked out with each arm held in a hammerlock by a different Secret Service agent or U.S. Marshal. Not I. </span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;">I prefer carrying him out in a straightjacket, like the addled madman he is. It reinforces what everyone ought to know — that he is an out-of-control loser who belongs not in the Oval Office, but in a padded cell at an institution for the criminally insane.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;">Which brings me to another bit of insanity.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Ckdop-dQPNo/X8lRi2o16HI/AAAAAAAAED8/zR-flyKZkukZDL_s4G78jkUYZal3U7drgCNcBGAsYHQ/s264/monolith.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="264" data-original-width="149" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Ckdop-dQPNo/X8lRi2o16HI/AAAAAAAAED8/zR-flyKZkukZDL_s4G78jkUYZal3U7drgCNcBGAsYHQ/s0/monolith.jpeg" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-size: large;">Yup. This thing. It popped up (supposedly) in the Utah desert one day, all science fiction-y and mysterious. Then just as mysteriously it vanished, only to pop up again (assuming it's the same one) in Romania. And then in California.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;">Some think it's a beacon for interstellar space ships, manned by extra-terrestrials on their way here to conquer and eat us. Some think it's a practical joke. Some, including me, think it might be a new phase in the work of that mysterious English artist, Banksy. Either that or you practical jokers in Sigma Alpha Epsilon had better cut it out.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;">But lately, my opinion on the matter has begun to change. I think its mysterious disappearance is of a piece with the disappearance of the cat who used to intrude on the reports-from-home of PBS Newshour reporter Lisa Desjardins.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;">Thanks to the COVID-19 Plague, Desjardins has been reporting to us more or less regularly from a room in her home. From time to time, her tuxedo cat would pop up in the background. I mean this cat (circled in black on the white shawl atop the gray ottoman) who I caught snoozing while Lisa was giving us the Washington lowdown.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-OlujuqeO6JM/X8lT3OzOGJI/AAAAAAAAEEI/wPgpJCcea1MNzX66tAy_9piRmyq_3Zp6QCNcBGAsYHQ/s2048/IMG_1152.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1536" data-original-width="2048" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-OlujuqeO6JM/X8lT3OzOGJI/AAAAAAAAEEI/wPgpJCcea1MNzX66tAy_9piRmyq_3Zp6QCNcBGAsYHQ/s320/IMG_1152.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><span style="font-size: large;">Once, (alas, I didn't think to photograph it) the cat was lasciviously licking its most private parts. Perhaps that's why I haven't seen the animal recently. I suspect that during broadcast hours it has been banished to the bathroom that contains its sand box.</span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span>Or perhaps, Lisa's cat is with the monolith in Utah. </span><span>Or is it</span><span> <a href="https://www.cnet.com/news/another-mysterious-monolith-disappeared-in-romania/">Rumania</a></span><span>?</span><span>Or is it</span><span> <a href="https://www.latimes.com/california/story/2020-12-03/mysterious-monolith-appears-southern-california-atascadero">California</a></span><span>? </span></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span>Between the pandemic and all the Trump insanity, not to mention the wandering monoliths and the banned cat, </span><span>I wouldn't be surprised if </span><i>all</i><span> of us end up in straightjackets.</span></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div><p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-12744831176575820802020-11-27T14:15:00.005-05:002020-11-27T21:18:02.473-05:00Donald Trump’s infantile temper tantrums — and how they are breaking and pulverizing national security<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-I7uhyKdfmII/X8FM6G3-isI/AAAAAAAAEDk/9uYanXkduGs2yi26wb7yHfXoLOX-w9UHQCNcBGAsYHQ/s220/220_F_229316609_MEFHIwgf8YLTo67eHRYkXZZoJZozd6Jq.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="147" data-original-width="220" height="269" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-I7uhyKdfmII/X8FM6G3-isI/AAAAAAAAEDk/9uYanXkduGs2yi26wb7yHfXoLOX-w9UHQCNcBGAsYHQ/w400-h269/220_F_229316609_MEFHIwgf8YLTo67eHRYkXZZoJZozd6Jq.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"> Imagine if this had been our President for the past four years. Oh, wait.</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Who from your childhood does Donald Trump remind you of now?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">For me, he’s <span style="color: #333333;">the bad kid at the birthday party who acts out so outrageously that his parents have to be called to pick him up early and take him home. But before they get there, he purposely and with malice aforethought breaks everything he can. </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #333333;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #333333;">He throws the birthday cake on the floor and stomps it into the carpet. </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #333333;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #333333;">He smashes the birthday presents by jumping up and down on them. </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #333333;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #333333;">He spits in the punch bowl. </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #333333;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #333333;">He says he has to go make a wee-wee and then deliberately pees on the bathroom floor.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And then, when his parents arrive, he whines to them that everybody at the party is being mean to him.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">This time, the party is Joe Biden’s, and oh how lucky we’d be if Trump limited his misbehavior to trashing a birthday cake and spitting in a punch bowl. It’s worse than that. Much worse. He is deliberately endangering our national security, weakening our defenses against Communist Russia, and inching us toward what could turn out to be a war, maybe even a nuclear war, with Iran.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">• Donald Trump “withdrew” us from the <a href="https://www.cnn.com/2020/11/22/politics/us-withdrawal-open-skies/index.html">Open Skies Treaty</a>, which allows our intelligence aircraft to fly over Russia and see what they’re up to — from missile launches to massing troops on the border of a third nation.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">• He deliberately made it difficult for Joe Biden to simply reverse our Open Skies treaty withdrawal. Trump has done so by planning to get rid of the specially-equipped <a href="https://nypost.com/2020/11/24/trump-administration-to-reportedly-dispose-of-observation-planes/">reconnaissance planes</a> used in the Open Skies flights. In effect, whether out of spite or because he’s in deep to the Russian espionage apparatus, the Russians couldn’t wish for a better <i>agent saboteur</i> than Donald Trump.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">• Having abrogated another treaty, in this case with Iran — the one that pretty much kept Iran out of the nuclear arms race for ten years — Trump has now begun advocating a military strike against Iran. The <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2020/11/16/us/politics/trump-iran-nuclear.html?action=click&module=Well&pgtype=Homepage&section=World%20News">New York Times</a> reports:</span></p><p class="css-158dogj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><i><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;"></span></span></i></p><blockquote><p class="css-158dogj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-size: large;">WASHINGTON — President Trump asked senior advisers in an Oval Office meeting on Thursday whether he had options to take action against Iran’s main nuclear site in the coming weeks. The meeting occurred a day after international inspectors reported a significant increase in the country’s stockpile of nuclear material, four current and former U.S. officials said on Monday.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="css-158dogj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #333333;">A range of senior advisers dissuaded the president from moving ahead with a military strike. The advisers — including Vice President Mike Pence; Secretary of State Mike Pompeo; Christopher C. Miller, the acting defense secretary; and Gen. Mark A. Milley, the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff — warned that a strike against Iran’s facilities could easily escalate into a broader</span><span style="color: #333333;"> conflict in the last weeks of Mr. Trump’s presidency.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">[snip]<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="css-158dogj" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin-left: 0in; margin-right: 0in; vertical-align: baseline;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="color: #333333;">Since Mr. Trump<span class="apple-converted-space"> </span></span><a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2020/11/09/us/politics/esper-defense-secretary.html" style="color: #954f72;"><span style="border: 1pt none windowtext; color: #326891; padding: 0in;">dismissed Defense Secretary Mark T. Esper</span></a><span class="apple-converted-space"><span style="color: #333333;"> </span></span><span style="color: #333333;">and other top Pentagon aides last week, Defense Department and other national security officials have privately expressed worries that the president might initiate operations, whether overt or secret, against Iran or other adversaries at the end of his term.<o:p></o:p></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;">The Iranians stuck to those limits even after Mr. Trump scrapped U.S. participation in the Iran accord in 2018 and reimposed sanctions. The Iranians began to slowly edge out of those limits last year, declaring that if Mr. Trump felt free to violate its terms, they would not continue to abide by them.</span></span></p></blockquote><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="background-color: white; background-position: initial initial; background-repeat: initial initial; color: #333333;"></span><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><o:p><span> </span></o:p><span>The upshot to all of this would be to get us involved simultaneously in war against two nuclear adversaries, Russia and Iran. No, it wouldn’t be good for the United States. But it would mean that Trump has made sure Joe Biden can’t enjoy his birthday cake or play with his new toys.</span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;">And frankly, that's all I think the snotty little brat wants.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"> <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-49088552094070448602020-11-23T11:26:00.014-05:002020-11-24T22:38:36.001-05:00The Schadenfreude Follies — OR — get your smirks, giggles, snorts, and quotable cutting remarks now, before the Trump Administration goes up in a puff of smoke.<div class="separator"><p style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="150" data-original-width="204" height="236" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-q-zj1Fc_yEE/X7vgDWjyRII/AAAAAAAAEDY/CIlGXgFI5ncCoTxEZ0jFkrOmj1z2wWEEgCNcBGAsYHQ/monkey-making-a-face-1551433487dBN.jpg" width="320" /><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"></span></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; font-size: x-large; font-weight: bold; text-align: center;"><a href="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-q-zj1Fc_yEE/X7vgDWjyRII/AAAAAAAAEDY/CIlGXgFI5ncCoTxEZ0jFkrOmj1z2wWEEgCNcBGAsYHQ/monkey-making-a-face-1551433487dBN.jpg" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br /></a></div>Embarrassed by Donald Trump?<p></p><p style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"><br />Quote of the week:</b><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;">From Jane Goodall, doyenne of the world’s great primatologists, <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2020/11/23/opinion/sway-kara-swisher-jane-goodall.html?action=click&module=Opinion&pgtype=Homepage&showTranscript=1">during an interview</a> with Kara Swisher of the New York Times: “Well, don’t compare Trump with a chimpanzee, because it’s terribly rude to the chimpanzee."</span></span></p></div><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>You-Can’t-Make-This-Up Name of the Year</b> <b>Award </b>goes to Rush Limbaugh’s producer. Get ready for it? All ready? You’re certain? Okay, it’s Bo Snerdley.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Psycopathic Corporate Management Award of the Month </b>goes to a group of management executives at the <b>Tyson Foods Company</b> after a wrongful death lawsuit claimed they bet on how many of their employees at meat processing plants would catch coronavirus. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">According to the<a href="https://www.wsj.com/articles/tyson-suspends-managers-after-lawsuit-claims-they-bet-on-covid-19-infections-11605821442"> Wall Street Journal</a>, thousands of workers were infected. Eighty-six of the infected line workers died leaving behind grieving spouses and children. But hey, Biff and Chip in the Executive Suite just pocketed $500 each from the betting pool, so the news isn’t<i> all </i>bad, right?<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Nation of Asswipes Award</b> goes to nearly the entire poplation of the USA (a few of us excepted) for resuming the Great Toilet Paper Panic after a blessed pause. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">What is it with virus pandemics and toilet paper? Beats me, but, “We’re headed for a product shortage and consumer panic of unprecedented proportions,” according to Burt P. Flickinger III of the consulting firm Strategic Resource Group, quoted in the Orange County, CA <a href="https://www.ocregister.com/2020/11/18/tp-runs-short-again-as-hoarding-resumes-amid-coronavirus-spike-holiday-shopping/?utm_email=5418F4AF25B4E4F394CFD5B0CD&g2i_eui=7EiLuDuqFr7XZS97rSuuEd%2fgHe829Ilm&g2i_source=newsletter&utm_source=listrak&utm_medium=email&utm_term=https%3a%2f%2fwww.ocregister.com%2f2020%2f11%2f18%2ftp-runs-short-again-as-hoarding-resumes-amid-coronavirus-spike-holiday-shopping%2f&utm_campaign=scng-ocr-localist&utm_content=curated">Register</a>. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">I don’t get it. There’s probably enough toilet paper already stashed in the closets, attics, and basements of America to burn down half of suburbia. Could we please start hoarding something else, folks? Q-tips for example? Maybe paperclips?<br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><span>Bad hair, go away, come back again </span></b><b><span>some other administration </span></b></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b><span> </span></b><span>If "the eyes are the window to your soul,” as Shakespeare once asserted, then what the hell is bad hair? Show me a despot, or someone telling lies for a despot, or inventing mean and terrible things for his despot boss to do, and three times out of five I’ll show you bad hair. </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">First and foremost there’s Donald Trump, with a comb-over that defies gravity (and probably a few other laws of nature.) More recently we’ve had Rudy Giuliani, with the only hair that, when he's under pressure, seems to bleed down his cheeks in rivulets. Then there’s Steve Miller, who tried to cover up his bald head with spray-on hair that looked like pig bristles imbedded in shoe polish. </span><span style="font-size: large;">In Korea, Kim Jong-Un has a coif that defies…almost anything, from explanation to reason, to flattery. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">And then there was this guy. If you’re young and wondering who owns that face and hairdo, the answer is no, that’s not Borat. That’s Mummar al-Gaddafi, the late dictator of Libya, who was badly beaten, sodomized with a bayonet, and then shot to death by his loving subjects while pleading for his life and telling the angry crowd, "God forbids this!" After that, they went after and killed three of his sons. (Trump family please take note: people are terribly fickle. Tch tch!)</span><o:p></o:p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-SwlYsRfx1_4/X7vfh5b0EwI/AAAAAAAAEDQ/_hla5_AL7ckOZktaSRorhshd6QG2ASkxACNcBGAsYHQ/images-1.jpeg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="225" height="169" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/-SwlYsRfx1_4/X7vfh5b0EwI/AAAAAAAAEDQ/_hla5_AL7ckOZktaSRorhshd6QG2ASkxACNcBGAsYHQ/w169-h169/images-1.jpeg" width="169" /></a></div><p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29361741.post-16020669671455228792020-11-18T12:13:00.005-05:002020-11-18T13:19:54.698-05:00Trump’s abandoned tuna fish; Giuliani’s legal fees; Miss Lindsey’s plea to, uh, disappear some ballots; and Georgia TV stations strike gold.<p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span><span style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">The thing about Donald Trump is, he tells so many lies that he forgets to follow up on them. Wasn’t it only September, a piffling two-and-a-fraction months ago, that Cranky Six-Year-Old was warning us that “Antifa’s” killer weapon of choice was<a href="https://www.cnn.com/2020/09/23/business/bumble-bee-tuna-trump/index.html"> tuna fish?</a></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">“They throw it,” Trump declared in a rally near Pittsburgh. “It’s the perfect weight, tuna fish, they can really rip it, right? And that hits you. No, it’s true. Bumble Bee brand Tuna.” </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">(Sorry, I had a perfectly lovely old Bumblebee Tuna jingle TV commercial to insert here but — you know — the "new improved" Blogger isn't letting me.)</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Hey, what happened to the soup?</b><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Trump had already forgotten his previous lie concerning Antifa weaponry, that the Antifa Forces of Evil were throwing soup cans. Now he seems to have forgotten the tuna fish, too.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Well, whatever. By tomorrow, he’ll probably forget why he thinks he won the election. In which case, perhaps Rudy Giuliani can remind him.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">After all, Rudy’s job of overcoming the results of a national election by walking into court and throwing a distraction of horsefeathers in the air is probably the best-paying work an evidently discombobulated lawyer can get. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">Will Trump pay $20 grand<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><b><span style="font-size: large;">a day for <i>anything</i>?<o:p></o:p></span></b></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">According to the New York Times, America’s Horsefeathers Artist, formerly “America’s Mayor” has asked the Trump campaign for <a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2020/11/17/us/politics/giuliani-trump-election-pay.html?action=click&algo=bandit-all-surfaces&block=trending_recirc&fellback=false&imp_id=958795153&impression_id=07f53fd0-2914-11eb-b180-ffe69aec1d89&index=0&pgtype=Article&region=footer&req_id=472061255&surface=most-popular">$20,000 a day</a> for his legal work. That presumably includes arranging press conferences at the “Four Seasons” — the garden center, not the hotel. You know, the one next to the porn shop and the crematorium. <o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">“A $20,000 a day rate would have made Mr. Giuliani…among the most highly compensated lawyers anywhere,” the Times pointed out.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">That’s assuming he can collect a nickel. Unless, of course, he started with a retainer of, oh, I dunno, let’s say a couple of million bucks? In which case, Trump still has a few weeks of legal representation before Giuliani has to go looking for work again.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">On the other hand, the same Times article reported Giuliani says he never asked for twenty grand a day. “The arrangement is, we’ll work it out in the end," Giuliani said. In which case, given who his client is, he is so screwed that he’ll be able to scrape together a living appearing in hardware store commercials.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Miss Lindsey’s housekeeping </b><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Nothing disturbs a Lady of Refinement like clutter. Which is perhaps why Senator Lindsey Graham reportedly told Georgia’s Secretary of State, according to a story in the <a href="https://www.yahoo.com/huffpost/lindsey-graham-denies-pressuring-georgia-official-to-toss-ballots-003444228.html?.tsrc=daily_mail&uh_test=1_02">Huffington Post and on Yahoo</a> to “find a way to throw out legal ballots.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Graham, of course, denies it and claims it’s “ridiculous” so think that a few little things he said could be interpreted that way. On the other hand, he’s one of the horsefeather artists who’s claiming the Presidential election was so beset by fraud that Trump was unable to win. So maybe Georgia’s Secretary of State is not so ridiculous after all. And speaking of Georgia…<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;"><b>How do you strike it rich in Georgia?</b><o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">The answer’s simple. Own a TV station while the Senatorial runoffs are running their ad campaigns.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">According to Ad Age, one of the leading trade publications of the Madman biz, “money is flooding into the peach state” and it’s therefore “the most wonderful time of the year—if you happen to own a TV or radio station in Georgia.”<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">The top spender is Republican Senatorial candidate Kelly Loeffler, who’s shucked out $32.5 million for advertising. Total up all the spending from all candidates and it comes to $101 million. That means each of Georgia’s 10.6 million residents will likely get whacked with $10-a-head worth of advertising by the time it’s all over.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><span style="font-size: large;">Quite frankly my dear, I have always relied on the kindness of ear plugs.<o:p></o:p></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: "Times New Roman", serif; margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt;"><o:p><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></o:p></p>The New York Crankhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04489472134701718697noreply@blogger.com0