Pudding and Pie
Kissed the Girls
And made them cry
When the Girls
Came out to play
Donald Trump seems to be taking his cues these days from Georgie Porgie of nursery rhyme fame.
"I have great respect for women," Trump says, while from the other side of his mouth he regularly disses women in general and Fox News personality Megyn Kelley in particular, not least of all by tweeting "I refuse to call Megyn Kelly a bimbo because that would be politically incorrect. Instead I only call her a lightweight reporter!" Sounds like he's trying to make her cry.
And yet, when he faces the challenge of possibly get asked tough question by her in the next Republican debate, he announces that he's not coming. Which is pretty much akin to running away.
That's cowardice in the face of of a woman, some say, an updated version of Georgie Porgie-ism. More than enough has been said of the question that if Trump is too wimpy to stand up to a single woman's questions in a debate, how will he stand up to entities ranging from Russia to ISIS?
Let me try a different thought on you. It's only a theory. But bear with me for a few paragraphs.
Donald Trump is desperately looking for the exit door. But without appearing to look for the exit door.
He started his run for president, my theory goes, on a lark — a nifty way to call attention to himself and build his Trump brand.
But the "brand" image is that of a tough businessman who never backs down. So he can't just pull a Sarah Palin, similar to Palin quitting the governorship of Alaska during her term. He'd look too wimpy to do that. Instead, he's been trying to insult his way out of his candidacy by losing to another Republican. Any Republican.
All his putdowns, from calling Mexican immigrants rapists, to insults to Kelly and Carly Fiorina, have actually been desperate cries for help. "Somebody please get me out of here," Trump has been obliquely whining and whimpering.
"I know. Maybe if I called Jeb Bush 'low energy.' Maybe if I tell the truth and call Ted Cruz a liar. Maybe if I..."
Nothing seems to have worked. The more childishly petulant he becomes, and the more he pouts like a six year old who isn't allowed a second helping of dessert, the higher his poll numbers have gone. So now he's trying a new tack. He's going to bow out of a high profile opportunity, and hope that this will end his candidacy by enabling other candidates get more attention to pull ahead of him.
Somehow it all reminds me of a wisecrack that many years ago was attributed sotto voce to Marilyn Monroe during the making of an ill-fated film called The Misfits, and later scripted for a much lesser actress, Anna Nicole Smith, in an even worse film, ironically called Illegal Aliens.
"Who do I have to screw to get out of this movie?"
Bend over, Donald!